MilSpouse Friends Every Military Spouse Needs

cappucino-95895_640By Kay Wise of Mommy Fabulous

Military Spouses face challenges that many spouses simply don’t face.  Deployments and PCS moves are a constant disruptions.  They require us to put on our superhero suits just to make it through the day.  But every military spouse has challenges in everyday life that requires us to have a some great superhero sidekicks by our sides to make it through.

One of the best lessons military spouses must learn is knowing when to ask for help.  Many spouses assume asking for help is admitting you can’t handle something- that you aren’t perfect.

Well, guess what?  You’re not.

You’re not Superwomen or Supermen, but having a great team of sidekicks will help you maintain your sanity and come out looking like the superhero you are!

Imagine a Commanding General going on a deployment alone, without a team, without support to help make critical decisions and carry out critical tasks.  As the CG of your own home, why should your everyday life be any different?  Just like a team in the field, it’s crucial to our to mission readiness and mission success at home to have a team behind you for support.  

The 4 MilSpouse Friends Every Military Spouse Needs

Here are four key team members every Military Spouse needs to carry out the mission of holding down the fort at home.

1.  The Hooah Spouse.  This person is always there, no matter what you need, no matter how crazy it may seem.  This is your “Yes Man”.  Whether you have a deployed spouse and you need someone to pick your kids up from school while you’re at an appointment, you’re too sick to make dinner, or need someone to help you bake cookies for your FRG, this spouse is ready to help.  This is someone you know you can call on to help you get the job done.

2. The Newbie Spouse. This spouse is your ego booster.  Having someone you can teach the ropes and give advice can be great for making you feel accomplished, helpful empowered.  When you know your opinion is respected, wanted and shared, you feel better about your own accomplishments and inspired to help others.

3. The Seasoned Spouse.  This person is experienced and has been there and done that.  Her “time in service” is her credentials.  She is there to share her advice and wisdom with you, give you pointers and share her own inspiring stories and triumphs.  This spouse is open to listening to your challenges and guides you in finding the best solutions.  When she doesn’t know the answer, she knows where you can find it.  She is your information station.

4. The Friend Spouse.  Want to do lunch or coffee?  Need someone to keep you up on the latest gossip or a shopping buddy to tell you if the jeans you’re about to buy make you look fat?  Someone to bounce ideas off of about how to keep your relationship spicy during deployments?  The Friend Spouse is the one can trust to be your bestie, whether you’re in need of “girl time” or “guy time” or a shoulder to cry on or an ear to vent to.

When unpredictability is considered the norm and the woes of the military life has caused you to make more lemonade than Minute Maid, it’s good to know that some of your fellow spouses are in your corner for every challenge and triumph.  Your biggest challenge is seeking out your team of key spouses at each duty station and through every change to ensure ultimate mission readiness and success.

photoKay Wise has been an Army Spouse for 14 years and recently earned the title of retired army spouse. This “time in service” as well as her many years as an army brat has given her a passion for helping educate and guide military spouses and military families, assuring that they know about the tools the military has in place to assure a successful life. She’s a student, a blogger and an education liaison for an online school, as well as an avid volunteer in her kids schools and community.


  1. […] I stopped trying to be a “good military spouse,” I discovered my true military friends: active duty females, male spouses whose wives work with my husband and a military spouse who did […]


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