During your life and journey as a military spouse you will meet and make so many new friends. Lots of moving ensures this, you will move, your friends will move, new people will move into your life. It’s the cycle of military life. Your duty station might be huge but your tribe of friends probably won’t be. You will make your own tribe with so many different tribal members, but at the core every military spouse tribe NEEDS these members.
They will be essential to your sanity. Because no one quite gets this crazy lifestyle we chose when we married our service members like the other people who are living it too.
1. 1. Mama Hen. Every tribe needs a mama hen, she’s the center of your tribe! She (or he) is the one who will come to your rescue when you catch the flu when your spouse is TDY and your kids have 875 activities to get to. She is oftentimes the peacekeeper when there is animosity, keeping everyone in line. With most of us living so far from home it’s nice to have a mom-like friend. The mama hen is everyone’s friend and go-to person when they need a pep talk.
Seasoned Spouse. She is the one with the answers. Don’t know what you can send overseas or what all these acronyms are? Ask her. She’s seen it all, maybe was even a military brat and is happy to help you navigate your life as a military spouse. She knows someone (or knows someone who knows someone) at pretty much any base you could get stationed at, so when orders drop, she’s your girl to give you the good, the bad and the ugly on your upcoming duty station.
The BFF. Your best friend. Sure you might end up with one at every duty station but you can never have too many best friends. Your BFF will support you through everything. No matter the distance or the time difference this is the one you call. Your first few months at any new base will be spent wondering why your best friend isn’t there with you. And if she moves first? The base will never be the same and you will count down days until you can leave.
The Fun One. Everyone needs the fun friend because everyone needs to cut loose once in a while. What better way to distract yourself from an upcoming deployment than having some fun? She will encourage you to try new things and take some risks! Nothing will get your mind off your deployed spouse quite like rock climbing. Don’t confuse the Fun One with the toxic Peter Pan.
Your duty station might be huge but your tribe of friends probably won’t be.
The One Who Tells It Like It Is. She will tell you to suck it up when you haven’t left your house in weeks during a deployment and will forcibly drag you out of bed and out to lunch. He can be a little harsh but he means well and does it from a place of love. Definitely a good friend to go shopping with. Where some people might sugarcoat things, the One Who Tells It Like It Is won’t. You can commiserate about the lack of things to do in town with this girl, because while not an optimist she sees things the way they are and yeah, sometimes they suck. On the flip side she will be the first to tell you things could be worse when you are complaining that your kids are zoned for the school you totally did not want.
Everyone’s tribe looks a little different. Your Mama Hen might also be your BFF and the One Who Tells It Like It Is might also be your Seasoned Spouse. Heck you might be the Fun One!