Ketchup Gate 2013: Military Families Out of Touch With America

ketchup gate 2013

Military families everywhere are getting fat on the government dole. The latest example of the lavish military lifestyle? Condiments- specifically ketchup.

At Camp Lejune in North Carolina, the Commissary reportedly boasts a staggering selection of 15 different types of ketchup on its shelves.

“It’s appalling,” says Don T. Treadonme. “The American tax payer never consented to tax-subsidized condiments. Enough is enough.”

According to the Washington Post, Ketchup Gate 2013 is just the tip of the iceberg:

 “…the next big war facing the U.S. military: confronting the enormous cost of pay raises, benefits programs and other taxpayer-subsidized services, which have increased almost 90 percent since 2001 and have become the fastest-growing part of the Defense Department’s budget.”

Given the state of the economy and national debt concerns,  it’s no wonder that American taxpayers are calling on servicemembers and their families to do what they do best: sacrifice.

After 12 years of government handouts like hardship duty pay, hostile fire pay/imminent danger pay, and family separation allowance, it’s about time the troops and their kin started to give back to those who selflessly gave so readily to them.

According to servicemember sympathizer site, SpouseBuzz, Amy Bushatz says that she’s most concerned about tone (which I believe is one of the 10 different types of soaps offered via the Defense Commissary Agency) of the articles criticizing military pay and benefits:

“Servicemembers, retirees and their families, the tone says, are acting like privileged brats for expecting, accepting and clinging to the benefits which encourage them to stay military or even to join in the first place.”

 Privileged brats? More like weaksauce warriors.

It’s only been a little over a decade of constant war and never-ending deployments, hardly what we’d call a major hardship.  And don’t we spend billions of tax-payer dollars training you to do your job? After all, what’s a little PTSD when you’ve got an endless buffet of milk and honey, or in this case ketchup and mustard, at your fingertips?

Before you start clinging to your lavish benefits package like a wealthy family clings to their handicapable tour guide, remember, you volunteered for this. Taxpayers have been doing you a favor. You’re welcome.


  1. Are you kidding me with this? Please tell me this is like the onion. Sickening.

    • This is definitely satire. Laugh it up because the reality is rather sickening.

    • She is kidding. It’s a satire. The author is a military spouse.

    • If you want to send the Washington Post a bottle of your own commissary ketchup, here is the address: The Washington Post Company, 1150 15th Street, NW, Washington, DC 20071

    • Wow…big compliment. Thank you. We love The Duffel Blog!

  2. Brilliant! I read Amy’s article earlier today. It’s a great one too.

    To spouses and service members alike, you know what you’ve earned and what you deserve. Don’t let the few small-minded people take that away from you. Thank you for all you do to ensure that even ignorant people are entitled to share their even more ignorant opinions and show the world how unintelligent and misinformed they really are.

    • Amy did a hard hitting piece…I absolutely loved her…what do you call them? Oh, facts. 😉

  3. I sent my ketchup to the Washington Post. (Found an off-brand 114 oz jug on Amazon for $12 – with free Prime shipping.) But even if you don’t want to spend the money to make the point, just slip a fast food ketchup packet into an envelope and stick a stamp on it. Or heck, mail him a ketchup coupon. Bonus points if it’s a commissary-only coupon.

    • Yes! We love it! We might even encourage our readers to mail a packet of ketchup to the WP. Rock on, Rebekah!

  4. […] Ketchup-Gate, it’s on about every military spouse related website out there. It was named by NextGen Mil Spouses after this article from the Washington Post about how commissaries are a huge part of defense […]

  5. […] Posted on 03/19/2014 by davidpaj — No Comments ↓ There are a lot of misconceptions about Commissaries, especially when it comes to the variety of products and the price of them. It’s true, shoppers at Commissaries are able to save money, but I think a lot of people think that the savings are unbelievable (remember this fall’s Ketchup Gate?). […]

  6. […] Ketchupgate, Marth Stewart said something, Someone expressed an opinion.  What do these all have in common? They’ve sent massive drama ripples across the milspouse blogosphere.  If it’s not one thing, it’s another. It’s happened before and it will happen again.  If there’s one thing milspouses are good at, it’s drama.   You won’t find any of that here on this blog.  This sums up my opinions on most of these types of things: […]


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