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The Joy of Cooking for One

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By Diane Norwood, MS, RD, CDE, Guest Contributor

Your service member has left for yet another deployment and you’re left holding the (grocery) bag, wondering, “Why should I bother cooking for one?”

The thought of subsisting on cereal and wine sounds great right about now.

If you’re the main chef in your family and your spouse leaves, you may feel some relief from having to cook. On the other hand, if your resident chef just deployed, you may feel despair and, well, hunger. And in either case, you may feel compelled to drown your sorrows a little bit. Go ahead and defer full-time “adulting” temporarily.

But after about a week, it’s time to pull yourself together. Your mental and physical health depends on it, and cooking for one can help!

As you may know, going through the motions of a normal routine, while maybe even improving upon it — and getting real therapy from a trained professional if you need help — is a far more productive and healthy use of your alone time.

Embracing the Positive Opportunities

There are definite deployment struggles when we have careers, schedules, properties and/or families to manage without the usual tag-team help of our spouse. Is it just me, or do houses, cars and children seem to have more problems that need fixing during these times? But somehow, one day at a time, we get through these challenges.

And when we look on the bright side, we can embrace endless opportunities for personal growth when we are suddenly blessed with the gift of more free time to spend however we choose. We may spend “bonus” free time on a big sewing project that covers the dining room table for months, a long overdue girls’ trip or even a simple reorganizing project that always gets put on the back burner.

The Joy of Cooking for One

The Best Self-Improvement Project: Cooking for One

Frankly, few opportunities for self-improvement are as challenging and yet worthwhile as your health. Cooking real-food meals for yourself is one of the best ways to spend time on your mental and physical health during your spouse’s absence. (Exercise is a close second!) There are many ways cooking for one is beneficial:

  • It provides less processed, real food.
  • It is mindful, which means you are planning ahead to eat healthy.
  • It establishes healthy eating habits over time, which may improve your health.
  • It saves money, which can minimize stress.
  • It offers psychological benefits, such as feelings of independence and accomplishment.
  • It can be creative and fun!

Of course, there are challenges cooking for one. But sometimes I think it’s easier.

When my spouse is gone, I like to try new recipes without the pressure of possible epic fails, savor foods my spouse might not typically eat, and reap the benefits of leftovers for days – which frees up time for other things I enjoy doing!

To make cooking for one during deployments as easy as possible, I asked 2 military spouse dietitians to contribute their best ideas along with mine. Because you are, indeed, worth the effort it takes to cook for one!

10 Tips for Cooking for One

Stock your kitchen with easy, real foods and keep it simple. Sometimes people say they can spend $100 at the store and still have “nothing” on hand to make a meal. If you really have no real-food ingredients in your kitchen, it’s hard to make a nourishing meal for any number of people.

Start by stocking a few basics: simple meats, eggs, vegetables to eat raw, steamed or roasted, salad ingredients, full-fat plain Greek yogurt, cheese, etc. And don’t forget you can use a toaster oven to keep it even simpler!

Invite friends to join you for dinner (or any other meal)! Better yet, make it a standing weekly dinner date with one or more spouses who are “in the same boat.” A weekly dinner with my friend and our 4 little kids was my salvation during my first deployment. Either take turns hosting and cooking, or make it a potluck every time.

Either way, you are making important social connections to combat loneliness, commiserate about some of the struggles, and enjoy the opportunity to support each another.

Portion leftovers into single-serving containers for lunch or dinner later in the week. Most recipes make enough for 4 people. Slow cookers and pressure cookers yield even more servings. That’s fine when you eat leftovers! This makes it easy to stock your fridge with a few grab-and-go healthy prepared meals.

Make friends with your freezer. Using the freezer to store extra prepared foods is just plain smart to minimize cooking efforts and food waste. Cook once, eat twice — or 3 or 4 times, if you’re really smart.

Fellow military spouse Tracey Linneweber, RD, CLT, suggests, “Cook what you want to eat and freeze the leftovers. Casseroles, soups, leftover meat, barbecue, pancakes, and breads all freeze well. You can take out leftover meat, add a baked potato, and frozen vegetables for a quick meal.”

Make skillet meals. One-pan cooking means one-pan cleaning with – you guessed it – leftovers. You can make a simple breakfast for dinner, such as scrambled eggs with veggies. Or quickly toss together sausage, bell peppers and onions. Or try my easy recipe for Inside Out Egg Rolls.

Prepare a simple foil pack meal ahead of time. Betsy Ramirez, a military spouse RD and blogger has a great idea for make-ahead foil packs.

The Joy of Cooking for One

She shares “I created a salmon and asparagus foil pack meal that I can make right after breakfast. I stick it in the fridge until it’s time to prep dinner. All I have to do is preheat the oven and cook them for 20 minutes.”

Pizza delivery isn’t even that fast!

Roast a sheet-pan meal. Cooking meat and vegetables in the oven together on the same pan is genius. It takes about 10 min to prep and then you are free to do something else within the 30 minutes it takes to cook.

Try my Greek Chicken and Veggies or Betsy’s Chicken Fajita Dinner.

Make a main dish salad. My favorite way to “cook” for myself is to make a large salad.

To my usual tomatoes, cucumbers, feta cheese and roasted nuts, I add rotisserie chicken or leftover grilled meats, beans (chickpeas or edamame), hard-boiled eggs, roasted vegetables, leftover corn off the cob, or fresh fruits (oranges, blueberries, strawberries, etc.) I skip store-bought dressings and pour a tablespoon of olive oil and a capful of apple cider vinegar, add salt and pepper, and toss.

Consider other resources. Farmers markets help inspire you to use what’s in season and they support local farmers. If you don’t have one near you, maybe you’d like to try a grocery store delivery service (Amazon Now perhaps) to free up time. It’s the next best thing to asking your spouse to pick up a few things at the store!

Allow yourself to be flexible. You don’t have to make a complete meal plan and grocery list. That’s the beauty of cooking for one.

Maybe you use a wipe-it board on the fridge to sketch a few meal ideas so you make sure you have what you need on hand. Or rather, open the fridge and see what you can make from what have on hand.

But if a friend calls you to suggest a spontaneous get-together, by all means, drop everything (into the freezer) or invite them over to enjoy the togetherness. Getting through deployment takes a military spouse village!

The bottom line is this: going through the motions of cooking for yourself — even the simplest of real-food meals — will help you remember you are worth it! So, don’t delay putting some of these “cooking for one” tips into practice.

The sooner you start cooking for yourself, the sooner you’ll reap the benefits. And you’ll be maintaining if not improving your mental and physical health — which will be one more thing to celebrate at homecoming!

Finding yourself eating cereal a few too many nights during deployment? Follow NextGen MilSpouse’s Pinterest boards for more cooking for one ideas. Click here to follow us. 

Diane Norwood is a registered dietitian, certified diabetes educator, and freelance health writer. Diane Norwood is a registered dietitian, certified diabetes educator, and freelance health writer. She wanders the world with her Navy Pediatrician husband and their three daughters, each born in a different country. She has made it her life’s work to savor authentic, healthy foods, grapple with and summarize nutrition science, and showcase how she makes easy, real food on her blog, The Wandering RD.

Confession: I Hate Running

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I hate running.

Let me say that again.

I hate running.

I know it’s a sin in some circles. And I’m not talking about a little venial sin. You know, the sins that don’t damn your soul. The ones where you go to confession and are absolved from it. No. I’m talking about the big daddy of them all; a cardinal sin. Some people I know would even include it in the 7 deadly sins. Runners take it that seriously.

I’ve heard it all:

“Running is great exercise.”

“The runner’s high is fabulous.”

“Everyone’s doing it.”

I know they are trying to be helpful but it makes me hate it all the more. Our service men and women have to run for PT. I get that. That’s forced on you whether you like it or not. And then there’s the Army or the Marine Corps marathons.  It’s woven into the fabric of their souls.

But to choose to run?  That’s where I draw the line.

Each year more and more of my military spouse friends are jumping on the running bandwagon. They start running groups on base. They post their training runs on Facebook. They Instagram themselves at the finish line of each race.

I even have a girlfriend who got lost during her first marathon. She ran farther than she had to because of it. That would’ve put me off forever.

There is that culture of running in the military so it makes sense that military spouses would feel the same way.

So every time there was a 5K on base or in town, and there’s always a race, spouses would start chattering about forming a team or signing up individually. For years I put them off. First off, I’m not an early bird. The only reason I woke up early was for my kids. And then let me tell you, I’m not a happy camper. And secondly (and most importantly), I hate running. I happily volunteered, but running? Nope.

Confession: I Hate Running

A few years ago, my daughter was getting ready to enter the Air Force Academy. As part of her prep work, she ran. She wanted me to join her but I used my usual tactics and put her off. Besides, I had functions to attend and I already walked the dog every morning. She reminded me that I walked the dog on a 5K loop but I wasn’t convinced.

Later that year, there was a 60th anniversary celebration for the Airborne Warning and Control System. Our wing was hosting various events and one of them happened to include a 5K color fun run. My daughter pestered me so much that I signed up with her. But the caveat was that I was going to WALK it while she ran.

Fast-forward to the day of the event. All morning long my daughter was reminding me that I already did a 5K daily. My comeback was always that I walked it and didn’t run it. I hated running. We lined up at the start and when the gun went off, so did we. My daughter encouraged me to run and I did.

I’ll be the first to admit that the peer pressure got to me.

I ran the whole thing.

And I did it without stopping.

Confession: I Hate Running

But hold the applause because I didn’t become a convert. There was no runner’s high and there was no sense of accomplishment. There was only annoyance that I was suckered into running.

Now, before you start scoffing at me, I’ve tried running at various points in my life.

When I was in high school, I joined the track team because I liked a boy. I was also overweight and I hoped that running would slim me down. I didn’t drop the weight and I eventually broke up with the boy.

In my 20s, I tried again. I got bored and annoyed so I stopped.

In my 30s, we adopted 2 pit bull mixes. I found that walking them twice a day wasn’t enough so I started running. I liked going in the woods but I didn’t like the running part.

Now, I run because I have to not because I want to. Don’t misconstrue that statement. It’s not a “I run because my body craves it.” As I said before, I’ve never felt that runner’s high. All I feel is the pounding of my feet on the pavement and the lack of oxygen into my lungs.

Actually, I will use any excuse to not run.

I had a chemical peel? Can’t overheat.

I broke my toe? Oops. Stay away from running.

I run because I have dogs that need the exercise and walking isn’t enough for them. Even then, I find myself telling everyone that I’m “interval training.” What that meant to me was that I ran until I didn’t want to and then I walked.

Last year my brother told me that interval training was ideal for your heart. Seven minutes of running followed by 7 minutes of walking. So that is what I do now. And again, it’s not because I enjoy it. It’s because I have to do it for my dogs.

So don’t judge me.

I’ll never be that girl who runs for fun. I won’t even be a person who runs for the health benefits. I’ll be the cheerleader for the runners. Or I’ll volunteer to hand out water. And that’s how I’ll connect with my tribe.

 

How To Use Mindfulness To Set Your Healthy Eating Habits On Autopilot

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by Diane Norwood, MS, RD, CDE, Guest Contributor

How To Use Mindfulness To Set Your Healthy Eating Habits On Autopilot

Photo by Anne Preble on Unsplash

Chances are you’ve tried building healthy eating habits. It is hard work and difficult to maintain them, even one at a time – especially as a busy working military spouse. You may even be down on yourself for your apparent lack of willpower and mindfulness. But maybe you haven’t heard this good news yet: building healthy eating habits is like “setting your brain to autopilot,” so you can think less about making healthy food choices every day.

This may sound too good to be true, but it turns out there’s something scientific to “muscle memory” that I believe may help you eat better. Charles Duhigg’s book, “The Power of Habit,” explains the fascinating science of habit building in great detail. The most fascinating thing is that when you build habits over time, your brain is actually changed and it becomes free to think less. That is, the more habits you have, the less thinking your brain does. Freeing, indeed!

There is plenty to think about in a fast-paced life. A little work now can make life easier later, which is something we can all wrap our busy brains around.

Wouldn’t it be nice to mindfully build healthy eating habits now so that you can “set your brain to autopilot” later in at least one important area of your life?

Building Healthy Eating Habits: How To Use Mindfulness to “Set Your Brain On Autopilot”

Habits, Willpower and Mindfulness

According to Duhigg, about 40% to 45% of the decisions we make in a day aren’t actually made; they are habits we perform without thinking. Have you ever absentmindedly placed your keys somewhere, walked into another room, and completely forgotten not only where you put them, but how you got where you are? Apparently, this is normal brain behavior. (How reassuring — but I do this so often, I think I have to own it as a bad habit!)

However, this muscle memory becomes more of a problem when we absentmindedly engage in eating habits that are detrimental to our health. Have you ever sat in front of the TV and eaten an entire bag of chips or box of cookies? Or do you get up from your desk every day at 3 p.m. to purchase a large, fancy coffee drink from your favorite coffee shop? Every day you may tell yourself not to do these unhealthy behaviors, but almost every day you fail yourself.

Honestly, part of the problem is the availability of unhealthy foods; they are all around us and there’s even the possibility that highly-processed, carbohydrate-rich foods may be addictive, although this hasn’t been proven. But we can’t change the food around us. So, the other part of the problem is our willpower. Why do we lack willpower? And more importantly, how do we build willpower to change these eating habits for the better?

Mindfulness plays a big part in building more willpower, according to Duhigg. Everyone is talking about mindfulness, right? In all honesty, it struck me as psychological mumbo-jumbo when I first heard about mindfulness. As a dietitian, I thought, “Of course we want to pay attention to what we’re eating.” But Duhigg explains that in order to build more willpower to sustain healthy habits, we must plan ahead how we will react in certain situations.

I couldn’t agree more, especially with regard to food! I frequently say that planning ahead is the key to eating more “easy, real foods” and fewer processed foods. So, that’s really all there is to mindful eating! And once you mindfully plan ahead for a while, a healthy habit is formed and muscle memory sets in, making life easier — and potentially healthier.

How Habits Work

Intuitively, we may know that habits — good and bad — start with a cue, a routine is performed, and a reward allows them to continue. Duhigg calls this the “habit loop.” Cues make starting the new routine easier. Rewards make you happy you completed the new routine. Although this seems like common sense, this is actually science at work to change your brain. Keeping your habit goals small and simple will help you succeed.

But sometimes when we want to change a routine, we are overly focused on the routine itself.  Sure, it’s how you identify what you want to change. But Duhigg explains that to effectively change a habit, we need to be focused on the cue and the reward as well.

For example, if you want to start running more (the routine), you could plan to run with a friend (the cue), and after your run you could eat a small piece of dark chocolate (the reward). Over the course of a few weeks, this will become a habit much easier than if you just tell yourself to run more. Eventually you won’t rely on the cues and rewards; your brain will be changed, and it will be a habit.  So, are you ready to start?

3 Steps to Building Healthy Eating Habits

1. Start small. If you’re like most people, you can probably think of 10 eating behaviors you want to change for the better. But it’s important to start with just one. For example, perhaps you eat take-out food for dinner 5 times a week and want to eat more real food meals.

2. Identify the cue and make a plan for your new routine. If you simply tell yourself not to eat take-out, you almost certainly will fail at changing this behavior. Instead, think about what cues you to grab and go and plan your actions for the week.

Is it lack of knowing how to cook healthy meals? 

  • Spend a few minutes on Sunday looking for easy dinner recipes for the week. Try searching the Internet or Pinterest for “real food” or “paleo” to hone in on less-processed ingredients in meals.
  • Try following fellow military spouse healthy food bloggers for inspiration.
  • You could try healthy options from a meal-prep service, such as Blue Apron or Sun Basket (organic and special menus available).

Is it lack of time? 

  • You could plan to use slow cooker recipes.
  • Make double batches to provide meals for at least 2 nights in a week or stock your freezer with the leftovers to have another week.

Is it that you hate to grocery shop? 

  • Try Amazon Prime or local grocery delivery options.
  • Join a Community Supported Agriculture (CSA) service that delivers vegetable boxes from local farms.
  • Try visiting a farmers market on a weekend; it’s always good to eat local and they are so social you may forget you’re grocery shopping!
  • Search for healthier take-out options, such as salads or lettuce-wrapped sandwiches or burgers, for example.

3. Then, don’t forget to reward yourself (but not with food). Maybe treat yourself to a manicure or pedicure with the money you saved by eating in for the week. Or take the family bowling or to play mini-golf.

Analyzing your eating habits to try to make them easier to achieve involves some willpower and forethought, but isn’t your family’s health worth it? Once you have been successful at changing one simple habit, in a few weeks, you can move onto another. Before you know it, you will be in the habit of eating healthier — which is as close to “autopilot” as we military spouses can get!

Diane Norwood is a registered dietitian, certified diabetes educator, and freelance health writer. Diane Norwood is a registered dietitian, certified diabetes educator, and freelance health writer. She wanders the world with her Navy Pediatrician husband and their three daughters, each born in a different country. She has made it her life’s work to savor authentic, healthy foods, grapple with and summarize nutrition science, and showcase how she makes easy, real food on her blog, The Wandering RD.

Editor’s note: This post may contain affiliate links to products we mention which basically means we earn a few cents if you buy through our links…they help us keep the lights on and the party going.

How to Live with Anxiety as a Military Spouse

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by Jana Wanner, Guest Contributor

How to Live with Anxiety as a Military Spouse

As someone who suffers from anxiety, I know it can be difficult to be married into the military lifestyle.

The millions of unknown possibilities of PCSing.

Or not PCSing.

Spouses on frequent TDYs, frequent deployments, frequent field time, frequent training.

Housing woes.

Health care troubles.

And doing most things on your own while your service member is away.

It’s a whirlwind of unknowns and possibilities, which can make your anxiety skyrocket. I know having anxiety is a taboo subject, and we aren’t supposed to talk about it. But, I’m here to talk about it.

There was a time that I was ashamed of having anxiety.

Canceling plans with friends.

Racing heart when I felt scared or nervous, sometimes even out of the blue for what seemed like no reason at all.

The feeling of constantly needing to be accepted by your peers, other military spouses or your spouse’s family.

Avoiding small talk. Shutting down and getting quiet when you’re around big crowds or around people you don’t know.

The constant questioning yourself,

“Wow, did I really just say that? I look like an idiot right now.”

And my favorite,

“Did I just do something wrong?”

If this is you, keep reading.

If this isn’t you, keep reading anyway. It may help you when you find yourself around military spouses who have anxiety.

How to Live with Anxiety as a Military Spouse

When I used to cancel on my friends (or when I still do it sometimes) it’s always a good thing to remind them that my anxiety is not something I can control. Anxiety does a lot of things to those of us that suffer. It’s easy for those who don’t have anxiety to say “Just suck it up and do what you need to do.”

Let’s put it this way. If you have a fear of snakes and someone puts you in a room full of snakes…are you still going to be able to do what you need to do? Will you be able to sit in this room and put on makeup without fear? Or cook dinner without fear of the snakes in the room? Or even send an email? No. You will be focused on your fear of snakes the entire time and you will be figuring out any possible way to get out of that room as fast as you can.

This is what people with anxiety go through. All day. All the time. There is no escaping your fears. No matter how unrealistic these fears seem to other people, they are very real to those experiencing anxiety on a daily basis.

We feel trapped, constantly in fear, with no way out.

And when you do have a way out (canceling plans because they seem too tedious at the time) you run as fast as you can.

The constant questioning yourself is another harsh reality that you face with anxiety. Here’s a fun story. It wasn’t fun at the time, but I can laugh at myself now.

A few years ago, I went to a ball with my husband. I was quietly sitting at the table, reading the plan of events from the program. As many with anxiety know, this is a coping mechanism some of us use in order to keep from making eye contact or awkward small talk.

Next thing I know, someone is tapping my shoulder. It was the sergeant major of my husband’s unit. He had been standing there holding his hand out (from what I understand, for at least a minute) smiling and waiting for me to look up. I had no idea. I felt like a complete idiot. I immediately shook his hand, smiled and apologized profusely.

The entire night, I was thinking “I am such an idiot! I just embarrassed myself and my husband!” In reality, it was a light-hearted moment. At the time, I did not think of it that way. And the truth is, he probably completely forgot about it after walking away.

But I dwelled on that moment for the entire night. Oh, who am I kidding? I dwelled on it for an entire month.

That’s the reality of anxiety. We dwell on things, no matter how trivial these things are sometimes.

You should never let anyone tear you apart because of your anxiety. One time, someone said to me, “Well if your marriage is fine, if your finances are fine, and everything in your life seems pretty perfect to anyone looking in, how can you possibly suffer from anxiety?”

It doesn’t work that way, people.

Those of us with anxiety have suffered our fair share of traumatic events, probably early on in childhood. Or maybe a major traumatic event as an adult (or several).

In my case, it was many years of traumatic events from childhood. Only my husband will ever know some of these events. I will never speak to anyone, other than my husband, about them. Those events set me up for anxiety and panic attacks later in life. Throw in the unexpected realities from military life and anxiety and panic attacks are going to happen, whether I expect them at the time or not.

So for people to not know what you have gone through, it should not be of their concern why you suffer from anxiety. You owe no one any explanation. If they truly love you or care for you, they will accept you, anxiety and all. And if they truly love you and care for you, they will work closely with you to figure out how to get through your most anxious moments.

If you’re around someone who isn’t talking much or if they are shutting down after you have had a lengthy conversation with them while in a big crowd of people, they aren’t being rude. They aren’t thinking that they hate you.

They are busy trying to figure out if they are being judged.

They are busy trying to make a quick exit to go re-charge, so that they can possibly come back to talk to you later. Or maybe they just ran out of things to say.

Those of us with anxiety have big hearts. That’s because we can feel pain more than others. We may be sensitive, but we love deeply.

If you have anxiety, you are not alone. There is help. Visit your doctor for a referral for cognitive behavior therapy or other treatment options. There is help if you feel like your anxiety is getting worse.

Please do not feel ashamed because there is no shame in getting help. There are many who suffer from anxiety and it’s not as taboo as it once was!

And for those of you on the outside looking in on those of us with anxiety: We may not always show it or some people may not see it, but we are listening. We are paying attention. We have feelings too. More than you will ever know.

My name is Jana and I am a stay at home mom with 2 great kids and a wonderful husband.  We are currently stationed in Georgia. I love traveling the world with my husband, no matter where the Army sends us.  I also love to write, I love wine, and I love the 90s.

How to Carve Out Time for Yourself When You Have No Time

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If you are anything like me your days are packed with stuff from the moment you wake up until you fall asleep – work, meetings, networking events, lunch with friends, volunteering, taking care of kids, mandatory fun event, and doing laundry.

You’re so busy with everything else you wake up one day and realize that you have done absolutely nothing for yourself in…well you can’t remember.

No time for a haircut.

No time to read a book.

No time for binge-watching “The Crown,” “Gilmore Girls,” “Scandal” or “Blackish.”

No time for a bubble bath. No massage. No mani/pedi.

No working out.

No nothing.

And without that me time, well you probably don’t feel 100 percent. I know that after months without a haircut I feel blah. If I don’t get any relaxation time I feel frazzled, constantly. And that’s good for no one – not my coworkers, not my spouse and definitely not for me.

So prioritizing me time is one of those things that I must put on the top of my to-do list. Ahead of that big work project and cleaning the house. Why? Because I know that if I can take any time for me that my work project will go much better and my chores won’t seem so tedious.

So just how do you find that time for you?

How to Carve Out Time for Yourself When You Have No Time

7 Ways to Carve Out Time for Yourself When You Have No Time

Find 5 minutes in your day. I know, I know, you probably don’t think that you have 1 minute, but find 5. Maybe it’s when you wake up in the morning or a coffee break or right before you go to bed. Whenever you have a few minutes to spare do something for you. Maybe it’s drinking that coffee in solitude. Or reading that magazine that’s been on your nightstand for months. Or start a journal. Walk around the block at your office.

Finding just a few minutes will help you clear your head to get back into the game.

Use that commute to your advantage. I used to commute over an hour each way to work every day. After awhile I really can’t listen to that new song AGAIN no matter how many times I change the station.

So I started listening to podcasts and audiobooks. This got me thinking more on my commute and not about my to-do list when I got to my destination.

I learned new things, laughed and go totally sucked into interesting stories. Podcasts are typically free and books can be fairly cheap if you have an Audible subscription.

Breathe. If you find yourself feeling stressed, take one moment and just breathe. Take a few deep breaths, step away from your computer and close your eyes. Meditate using an app or YouTube video. Taking just a few moments away from what you’re doing will refresh you.

Pro-Tip: Blue Star Families’ members can get the Headspace app for free. Click here for more information.

Schedule your me time. I’m a calendar person, to the point that I tend to plan weeks in advance, especially when I’m busy.

So that workout? Put it on your calendar. If it’s there then you can’t schedule a meeting during that time and you’ll get a reminder to go take care of you.

Working military spouse Terry Babcock-Lumish said she schedules her spinning class as a meeting on her calendar.

After regularly letting workouts slip while prioritizing time for clients, colleagues, and students, I began scheduling a spin class or yoga as if they were meetings with myself. When we reschedule on ourselves, that’s a statement we make about the importance of our own physical and mental well-being

Even better – find someone to keep you accountable.

At one of my jobs, my co-workers and I used to workout together over lunch twice a week at our office gym. So on days when I felt particularly like not working out I knew that they would bug me at 11:30 a.m. to go change and that they’d be disappointed if I didn’t join them.

Outsource something. If you are really strapped for time and your house is becoming a hot mess, look into hiring someone. Taking something off of your to-do list creates time for you to do something that you want to do, which I’m guessing is not vacuuming the whole house or dusting.

Say no to something. Did you sign up to be FRG secretary but can never make meetings? It may be time to help find a replacement. The organization could benefit from having someone in that position that they can count on regularly. Don’t just completely bail on them though, help find a solution so they aren’t left high and dry.

Do the thing that you dread first. Sometimes I won’t do something on my to-do list *cough*vacuum*cough* because it’s my least favorite task but I always feel better once it’s done. Then I can do something that I want without feeling guilty. I’m the type of person that if my house isn’t a certain level of clean or my desk is too disorganized I can’t get anything done, including relax. So get those dreaded tasks done as fast as you can so that you can enjoy binge-watching “The Crown.”

What are some ways that you find time for yourself when you barely have any leftover time in your day?

How to Get in the Swing of Healthy Eating During Deployment

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When our service members are gone, us military spouses do one of 2 things:

We either eat chocolate and junk food while drinking our wine or we decide to eat healthy.

Honestly, I’ve done both and though that junk food tastes amazing in the moment, and really there’s nothing better than a fresh pizza from the small Italian pizzeria down the street…. I have to swear by the healthy eating tactic instead.

If your spouse is anything like mine, he brings home beer at the end of a long day or proposes eating take-out from the pizzeria. He is inevitably coming home with bottles of soda-pop and bags of my favorite chips and man…while he is home eating healthy can be so hard! Even though I cook dinner most nights, the junk food calls at lunch and snack time. So, when my spouse is gone on TDY or deployment it is a great time to reset my body and my healthy eating habits.

how-to-get-in-the-swing-of-healthy-eating-during-deployment

Here are my 4 tried-and-true healthy eating tips when you’re home and your spouse is on deployment.

Lifestyle Change

Choose a lifestyle change plan and stick to it.

To reset and curb my sugar and bread addiction I enjoy doing Whole 30 while he is gone. Whole 30 is a lifestyle change that takes you down to a bare bones whole foods only menu. Meat, veggies and fruit make up the menu with absolutely no added sugars, no dairy and no grain.

Whole 30 is hard, but to me it’s kind of fun to have that challenge.

The last time I did it, I lost 10 pounds (that I never gained back) and I found afterwards that most candies were now too sweet and unappealing to me.

This lifestyle change got me back in the swing of meal planning, trying new recipes and cooking dinner each night. This can really help with holding onto a stable schedule when your spouse is gone.

Get the Kids Involved in Cooking

When your spouse is gone, the kids are constantly underfoot while you are trying to cook. This can lead to taking shortcuts like ordering from the pizzeria down the street. To help with this, my dad built our kids a learning tower (step stool with rails) so they could reach the counter and help with stirring, mixing or just generally checking out what you are doing. Your kids learn about healthy eating and you get a little more peace – everyone wins!

Try New Recipes

You know that veggie you swear you hate? Look up some recipes and try to prepare it in a few different ways. You may be shocked to find that you actually really like this vegetable! Just not the way your mom used to steam it and toss it on your plate. It’s amazing what a little garlic and lemon can do to a dish!

If You Fall Off the Healthy Eating Wagon, Hop Right Back On

The biggest problem with diets, is that once people break them they feel like they should give up and then they fall back into their old habits. It is OK to have moderation and cheat meals or cheat days! Just hop right back on that healthy eating wagon and remind yourself why you got on it in the first place.

During deployment, we can already feel really yucky. We miss our spouses and we hate our new routine and we just feel so lonely.

Though chocolate may make you feel better for a few minutes, too much of it will make you feel worse in the long run.

Healthy eating has proven to improve not only your physical health, but your mental health too — so give it a chance during this season of your life – you may be shocked how much you like it!

What are your tips for eating healthy when your spouse is deployed? Share them in the comments section.

 

8 Races You Want to Add to Your Bucket List

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Running seems to be sweeping through the military spouse community.

8 Races You Want to Add to Your Bucket List

Between those who were already runners before the military life and those who joined through running clubs, like Stroller Warriors, there are a ton of us hitting the pavement.

Running is even better when you can pair it with a race that directly benefits and supports our Armed Forces!

In this spirit, here are 8 of the best military racing events for military spouses.

I apologize in advance for the Marine Corps heaviness of this list, but when you do something right…

8 Races Military Spouses Want to Add to Their Bucket Lists pinnable

Marine Corps Marathon

This iconic marathon, held each year in late October, starts next to the Pentagon and ends at the Marine Corps Memorial. Dubbed The People’s Marathon, it has become so popular that it now uses a lottery system to be more equitable. (The 2016 lottery opens March 24.)

Along the 26.2-mile route, runners pass Arlington National Cemetery, the National Mall and monuments, and run underneath the beautiful fall foliage of Arlington, Va. On Haine’s Point, there is usually a mile of memory that honors service members who have been killed in action.

The 8 Best Running Events for Military Spouses

At the finish, a Marine lieutenant will place the medal around your neck. Just try to get through the Marine Corps Marathon without tears.

Army Ten-Miler

Held 2 weekends before the Marine Corps Marathon, many marathoners run this as a tune-up for MCM.

The 8 Best Running Events for Military Spouses

The course is basically the same, but MUCH shorter and with some deviations closer to Georgetown and near the Smithsonian Institution Building (The Castle). What makes the Army Ten-Miler unique is the absence of a finishers medal. Instead, runners receive a challenge coin.

Navy-Air Force Half Marathon and Navy 5-Miler

Another D.C.-area race, this one goes off in late September with a start/finish line adjacent to the Washington Monument. The Navy-Air Force half was voted “One of the Year’s Best Half-Marathons” by Runner’s World.

Historic Half

This race takes place in northern Virginia. Fredericksburg was the childhood home of George Washington and the site of a major Civil War battlefield. It is also a hop, skip and jump away from the crossroads of the Marine Corps in Quantico.

This race is popular because it is part of the MCM series and offers guaranteed entry into the Marine Corps Marathon. This race route is super hilly, with a notorious climb at Hospital Hill.

Air Force Marathon

This race started in 1997 to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the founding of the Air Force. Run in Dayton, Ohio, this race weekend offers full, half marathon, 10K and 5K events. It starts and finishes next to the National Museum of the Air Force and loops around the Wright-Patterson Air Force Base.

The 8 Best Running Events for Military Spouses

This race makes the list because of the sweet medal. Each year, a different aircraft is chosen to highlight on the medal. Plus, the Air Force Marathon is a Boston Marathon qualifier.

Marine Corps Marathon 10K

This smaller, shorter race is run at the same time as the MCM, but starts at the National Mall and follows the last 6.2 miles of the Marine Corps Marathon.

This is a nice intro into the MCM series, without the crazy hill of the Historic Half or the grueling mileage of the full marathon.

Plus, you still get the medal from a Marine at the finish and access to the post-race celebration in Rosslyn. And you might beat out the crazy taxi and metro lines!

On-Base Race series

Almost every base has a race series of some sort, from motivational runs to early morning 5Ks organized by MWR.

Some the best races are (not shockingly) organized at USMC bases. Camp Pendleton hosts the Hard Corps Race Series, which includes road, trail, bike and triathlon events. The Heartbreak Hill Half is supposed to be amazing!

Also in sunny SoCal, the MCRD San Diego has the Bootcamp Challenge: competitors complete real boot camp fitness and obstacle tests.

Camp Lejeune offers the Grand Prix, which is advertised as allowing civilians to compete with real Marines and use actual training locations.

Chances are, your base offers some sort of running series too! Stop by your military installation’s fitness center for more information.

9/11 Heroes Run

This is a run that can happen anywhere in the world. The Travis Manion 9/11 Heroes 5K Runs are locally organized and happen each year on or around September 11. An interactive map helps racers find a location near them or provides information about starting their own race.

It doesn’t get much better than this: a run dedicated to honoring selfless service and sacrifice organized by motivated community members, helping local veterans, military members, first responders and military families.

Which of these military races have you ran?

15 Must-Have Apps for Every Day of Your Military Life

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by Sylvia Salas Brown, Guest Contributor

Imagine yourself on Day One. Whether you are a brand-spanking new military spouse or a seasoned military spouse who just did another PCS and your HHGs have been delivered and the moving truck has just left the curb.

So what do you do on the first day of your new duty station? Pick up your smartphone and install some of these top apps to get you through this PCS move and the next few years at your new installation.

These apps can possibly pave the way for you to have a successful military life and help you thrive anywhere you go! These apps are in no particular order and they cover most aspects of military life.

15 Must-Have Apps for Every Military Spouse

Beware that some of these apps cost money and have ads in them and some don’t, as well as in-app purchases that you can make.

15 Must-Have Apps for Every Day of Your Military Life

1. Around Me. This app lists information about your local area such as restaurants, movie theaters, hotels, gas stations, shopping, banks, coffee shops and more. It also boasts local weather forecasts.

If you are a newbie to the area (read: haven’t been stationed there before), this is a great app for you to discover your local town.

My Base Guide and MilTraveler‘s Base Directory are two that are specifically military-related apps for your particular base that include all information regarding your current location from base regulations to units and telephone directories.

2. Certifikid. For those of us with children, you know how important it is to keep the kids occupied while the service member is out either on TDY or deployment. This app will help you find activities for you and your family in the local area. They have great deals on family-friendly places for those of us on the go. You can sign up for email notifications as well.

Just be sure to check if your city is part of the Certifikid network although most major cities seem to already be listed.

3. ShopSaavy. If you are a deal finder, this is your app! This app brags as “your one-stop resource to save time and money and to get all the best sales from your favorite stores” and you just can’t beat that!

You scan the barcode and a list of either online or local stores that sell that particular item populates with prices and address of the nearest stores with a link to the store. How cool is that?!?!

4. Discount Soldier. This app will help you find military discounts in your local area. It will also show you a map of the location. It is for all active duty, reserve, guard and families and even former military.

Honorable mention to this app is Military Discounters. They work essentially the same and this one also uses your phone’s GPS system to generate the location of the discount.

5. Commissary Rewards. So before you had to log into your profile and then click, click, click on all your coupons and you’d be there for like 30 minutes on your computer trying to decide which coupons you were going to use on your commissary trip and before that you had to sit at home and clip coupons. No more!

You download the Commissary Rewards app and it shows all the coupons you need by category.

So if you are at the cereal aisle, you go to the Breakfast & Cereal menu and find your coupon, “clip” it and boom it goes to your profile. When you get to the register you scan your card and it takes your coupons.

No hassle to take the coupons with you, or [gasp] forget them at home as you are loading up the kids in the car.

6. Michael’s. This app is a must-have for the creative milspouse. Once you download either or all (because there are others [jumping wildly with excitement]…read: HobbyLobby & Jo-Ann’s Fabrics), you specify which location you shop at or not, if you have multiple stores within the area and it shows discounts on products.

This is especially good during the holidays when you are purchasing items to create gifts or when redecorating your house, scrapbooking or just need inspiration.

7. Instructables. If you’ve been left to your own devices and want to re-do a honey-do, this, my friends, is the app for you! This app has all sorts of How-To instructions and Life Hacks. You can even share a creation of yours, look through and find a project to make out of household materials, for say, the science project that’s due tomorrow that your child gave you notice for today.

8. My FitnessPal. I have friends who swear by this one. This one is similar to Fitbit, but you don’t have to have the device to track your exercise.

9. Daily Workouts. Daily Workouts has Butt, Ab, Leg and Cardio sister apps that help you workout that targeted muscle group. The Daily Workout app is a total body workout app.

This is great for when you are stuck at home in the winter and like me, hibernate, and rarely make it out to the gym. Or if you don’t want to try these exercises in a gym class and feel like you will look silly [ahem!], try doing these exercises in the comfort of your own home.

With these apps, you will definitely get a good workout. I use these, although I’m not a fitness buff by any means, and I have been able to keep up with the actual workouts. Well worth the download.

10. Military Wife Deployment Survival Guide. If you’ve gone through a deployment or your spouse just got orders, this is the app! It counts down to the days until their safe return! It was created by the wife of a Marine (OORAH!) and will make your life easier. It prompts you to an activity like the countdown, a corkboard, a motivation section, and a “Find my Zen”…who doesn’t need some Zen in their life?!?!? A similar app in this category is Soldier Countdown.

11. Google Translate. If you find yourself OCONUS, this app can be a lifesaver or if you met a new spouse that is not from the U.S. and you want to learn their language (or just want to learn a new language), this can help you. We have a great diversity in the military and I feel empowered and enthusiastic to be able to learn from all these great folks about their native languages and cultures.

I recently began learning Italian from a friend that has since moved on, but used to be stationed where we are currently. We are sort of switching languages. She speaks her best Spanish to me and I try my best Italian on her. We have a good time doing this back and forth.

This app also has audio and speaks the language to you, so you can learn how to pronounce the words.

12. MilitaryByOwner. This app helps you find rentals as well as homes for sale in your local area and you can save your favorites and be ready to go! Realtor, Trulia and Homes are also honorable mentions that are similar to MBO and have some of the same features. Another military moving related app is The Big Moving Adventure. It’s for kids to help them with their move-related questions.

13. My Military Life. This app has all the information you might need in regards to the military lifestyle. From forms to installations to spouse services to finances, this app has it all. This can help make your milspouse journey much easier. You can even customize to-do lists, it has reminders and it boosts suggestions by service branch, location and your specific needs. Definitely a must-have!

14. PBS Kids. If you have found yourself at the commissary, with your clipped coupons and screaming kids…well, bust your phone out and play a video on this app. I have been able to have at least a 5-minute conversation with my husband and a friend, at separate times, when my kids watched a video from one of their educational shows. And some of these shows, like Sesame Street have their own app for military families. So go ahead and get this one. You will thank me and keep your sanity!

15. Take-A-Hop MilSpaceA. For the traveler in you, this app can get you started on flying with Space A. This app boasts as being “the exclusive app for all DOD travelers wanting a quick, easy, reliable, and authorized means to sign up for Space-A”. It recently updated its local information section and has enhanced mapping and routing information.

I hope that this list gets you started on your journey and that it helps you on your path to a great adventure that is the military lifestyle.

Do you have an app that you particularly love? Please share it with us!

sylvia salasbrownSylvia Salas Brown is a Texas native, or as she likes to call herself, a “misplaced Texan” since she married into the Army. She graduated from the University of Texas at San Antonio with a bachelor’s degree in technology (so a geek girl, pretty much) and a Masters in Public Administration from CUNY John Jay College of Criminal Justice. She has two boys aged 5 and 3. Her husband has been active in the Army for over 15 years. When her nose isn’t stuck in a book, she loves to sew, try new recipes, thrift shop, repurpose just about anything, hang out with my family and travel.

3 Ways You’re Stressing Yourself Out (and How to Stop the Madness)

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Have you ever wondered if you are stressing yourself out? I know I’m guilty. I’ve been known to maintain a ridiculously relentless pace of 110% enforced on me, by me. Here are 3 things I know I’m guilty of and maybe you are too.3 Ways Military Spouses Stress Themselves Out (and How to Stop the Madness)

1. You say yes to things when you really want or need to say no.

“Yes, I can help you with your resume!”

“Yes, I can volunteer 5 days a week!”

“Yes, I can take on that extra work project!”

There’s something so wonderful about seeing the light in someone’s eyes as you agree to do whatever chore/project/favor they’ve asked you to do. Saying “yes” can become like a drug. It makes you feel useful, needed and appreciated…until it doesn’t. Sometimes saying “yes” means saying “no” to yourself.

3 Ways Military Spouses Stress Themselves Out (and How to Stop the Madness)

No, you don’t have time to enjoy your evening. No, you don’t have time to work out. No, you don’t care that you’re feeling overextended.

Have you ever said yes to something you should’ve said no to because you didn’t truly have the time to do your very best work or give your fullest attention? As someone who is studying and working on mastering the art of “no” without feeling like a total schmuck (I feel like there’s a book title there), I can tell you this: Saying no isn’t about turning down every single opportunity or being selfish.

Saying “no” is about making sure that everything you do say “yes” to is a whole-hearted, passionate, committed “Yes!”

2. You are trying to do it all perfectly.

Perfect job. Perfect military spouse. Perfect parent. Perfect dinner. Perfect body. Perfectly clean house. Perfect sister. Perfect son. Perfect friend.

Perfectly burned out.

Just because we have the power to do it all doesn’t mean that we can or have to do it all perfectly. And if you’re in a relationship, you better not be trying to do it all all by yourself. Just sayin’.

3 Ways Military Spouses Stress Themselves Out (and How to Stop the Madness)

I am guilty of buying the “do it all” mentality and I almost lost my damn mind in the process. For some reason between running several businesses, volunteering with nonprofits, taking care of my 2 girls while solo parenting during a yearlong separation, I couldn’t seem to manage staying on top of house chores. The laundry basket mocked me. My bathtubs threw me copious amounts of shade.

It took me 6 months in to finally come to grips with the fact that I needed help or I was going to lose my shit. I think I apologized to the housekeeping service for inconveniencing them when I called to schedule a long overdue cleaning-therapy session.

Perfect can go to hell right along with doing it all. The only thing you should be focused on is being perfectly sane.

3. You don’t ask for help or when it’s offered you don’t take it.

3 Ways Military Spouses Stress Themselves Out (and How to Stop the Madness)

Think about how good you feel when you’re able to help a friend, neighbor or stranger even. Doesn’t that feel amazing? Why on Earth would you not allow someone else to have that warm and fuzzy feeling by helping you out? Asking for help can be one of the most irrationally difficult things to do, but I bet you rarely feel like you’re being put out when someone asks it of you. Right? Right.

I get it. You’re strong and awesome and you’ve got life on lock. Asking for help doesn’t change any of that. Promise.

And when someone offers you help…take them up on it! Chances are that they wouldn’t be offering you help if they didn’t want to be of service.

You’re not a charity case or incompetent or dependent. You’re being a human being.

And if you’re anything like me, you’ll look for the first opportunity to return the favor.

Are you guilty of stressing yourself out? How are you stressing yourself out? Tell us in the comments!

How to Stay Sane When You Are Insanely Busy

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by Melissa Schoonover, Guest Contributor

Alarm. Lunches. Work. Kids. Dog. Spouse. Activities. Weekend. Repeat.

When you signed up to become a military spouse, you found that on top of keeping your full or part-time job, military life has its responsibilities and may seem like an additional full-time gig: (including but not limited to) keeping the house from imploding, maintaining a close eye on the human and animal children, financially contributing to bills and groceries so said children will not starve, making appointments for you and your family and being on your “A” game when your service member is deployed, at training or simply working too late to help out the way you might need them to.

Although you love your crazy-beautiful life, you might often find yourself overwhelmed, stressed and in need of some “you” time.

As an Air Force wife balancing a full-time job (teaching high school and volunteering), with maintaining an organized lifestyle at home for my husband and my dog AND making time to focus on my interests and on graduate school…I’ve found that there are 13 solid ways to balance my work schedule with my military spouse responsibilities without spiraling downward into a life of monotony:

13 Ways to Maintain Balance in Your Crazy-Busy Life

13 Sane Ways to Maintain Balance in Your Crazy-Beautiful Life

1. Leave work at work. This sounds crazy, but I know from experience that teachers are famous for bringing work home. Your contract hours are probably from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. or in my case, 7:15 a.m. to 2:50 p.m. This means: get off of Facebook and Pinterest on your breaks to grade those papers or send those e-mails and work with your lunch at your desk on those days-where-the-pile-just-won’t-go-away.

If you bring work home, your stress levels will increase and you won’t be able to focus on the most important part of your day: being with your family.

2. Don’t grow up. Remember how you played the violin in high school? Or took karate class when you were a kid and loved it? Or liked to finger paint with your sister? Find grown-up ways to do these things.

Sign up for a music lesson or take a kickboxing class at the gym and go once a week. Round up your friends, print a Groupon and go to one of those trendy drink-wine-and-paint-pictures places.

For us cheap nerds: join a book club, a Bible study or a trivia team (my personal favorite). Your calendar has room for your interests too!

3. Have a routine. In addition to toting the kids around to their activities all week, have a set time to schedule a daily chore for the house, a day when you’ll bring the dog to the dog park or to day care, a day you will go grocery shopping and a day where you’ll cook for the week.

4. Make lists. Speaking of grocery shopping, keep your shopping list saved on your phone. Chances are you’ll be buying some of the same groceries each and every time you go. Have the kids or your spouse help out with it to show that you value their input.

Lists aren’t only for shopping. As a family, compile a bucket list of free and fun things you’d like to accomplish by the end of the summer or during the weekends throughout the year and stick to it.

5. Make friends at work. As much as you like to pretend that you dislike where you work, chances are there are a few people there that you could roll with to get you through the day. Work friends understand your 8-hour daily struggle and they will be a great support system when times get tough inside and outside the workplace. They’re also great for coffee runs and happy hours.

Work from home? You need professional friends too.

6. Make local friends outside of work. Attention all military spouses: make friends with other military spouses. Find the spouse Facebook group for your base or post, communicate with other spouses in your area and don’t flake out when someone plans an event and you are available to attend.

The “worst” that could happen is that you play Bunco, make a new friend, drink wine, eat cheese and crackers and play with the host’s dog. If you choose to follow through with your friendship, you’ll find that other military spouses will understand your struggle, support you when your spouse is deployed or TDY and offer assistance with your kids when you need it.

Speaking from a completely unbiased standpoint: Military spouses make some of the most amazing friends.

7. Date your spouse. This goes back to Marriage 101. Never stop courting, never stop flirting, never stop setting time aside for you and your spouse.

Call the babysitter, send flowers, go to your favorite Mexican restaurant that has the jalapeño queso that you both successfully destroy with 2 refills of tortilla chips, wear perfume and makeup or simply take a walk to view some pretty scenery on a Saturday afternoon.

Related: Romancing the Ever-Absent Military Member

Dating doesn’t always mean spending tons of money. It means take time out of your hectic schedule to remind each other why you have stayed together throughout your spontaneous, hectic and unpredictable military marriage.

8. Plan ahead. Save time and money. Cook all of your meals to freeze or put in the refrigerator on your free day (for me, it’s Sunday). That way, you’ll have an extra hour or two each night to spend with your family.

Something that works for us is to make 2 different types of lunches and 2 different types of dinners and rotate lunches and dinners each day, so it feels like you have something different each day. Also, plan to splurge once a week on takeout Chinese or pizza.

9. Unplug. This one might be the most difficult for all of us. Our lives can be held captive in our little electronic devices. If your spouse and kids are home, try to take an hour (minimum) out of your day to place your phones, iPads, and laptops in a drawer somewhere on silent. A bright screen cannot replace quality time and you will regret not doing this if your quality time is taken from you due to your spouse’s future assignments.

10. When you ARE plugged in, call your family. FaceTime and Skype are brilliant inventions for the military family. Staying connected to your family members and friends aside from social media and email is a great way to display the importance of communication, love and support for your children and your spouse. I’m 99.9 percent positive that it will brighten the day of the family member you call, as well. They miss you more than you know.

11. Take care of your body. This statement appears on almost every ways-to-a-happier-life list and here’s the reason why: BECAUSE IT IS IMPORTANT.

Get sleep, take a multi-vitamin before bed, work out or go for a walk 2 to 4 times a week, go to the doctor (hooray for Tricare, amIright?) and stay away from fast food and soda as much as you possibly can. Add some of these to your routine, and your entire family will thank you later.

12. “Treat Yo’ Self.” 

Get your nails done (you too, fellas!), drink that glass of wine in your sassy wine glass, buy that extra scoop of chocolate ice cream, go on a drive with the windows down without a destination while blasting ’90s dance music and for all that is good and holy, buy those shoes that you’ve been eyeing.

13. Breathe. When I was feeling helpless and overwhelmed with work and life, a friend (see #5) told me, “You’re doing the best you can.” Sometimes, we don’t give ourselves enough credit for the effort we put into every aspect of our lives and for the lives of our military family.

Take a step back, breathe and have confidence that you are simply doing the best you can to balance your busy, exciting and fabulous milspouse life!

What ways do you keep your life in balance? What do you do when you feel like your life is out of balance? 

Melissa SchoonoverMelissa is a proud Air Force wife, a former NFL cheerleader and a high school English teacher and dance coach. Aside from working and training in dance, she is completing her master’s degree in rhetoric, writing and digital media studies. Melissa and her husband met in Atlanta, GA, and currently live in Colorado Springs with their black labrador puppy, Brooklyn. You can follow Melissa on Twitter, Instagram and check out her favorite pins on Pinterest. 

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