• About Us
    • PR & Advertising
    • OneMilFam
  • Submit a Featured Story
  • Are You A MilSpouse Who Works?
  • Contact Us

NextGen MilSpouse

The Online Destination for Today's Military Spouse

  • Podcast
  • Join Our Mailing List
  • MilSpouses Who Work It
  • PCS
  • Career
    • Career Advice
    • Small Business
  • Money
  • Military Life
    • Deployment
    • Tricare
    • Resources
    • Travel
  • Self
    • Wellness
    • Personal Growth
  • Relationships
    • Friendship
    • Parenting
    • Marriage
  • Humor

Fewer PCSes In Our Future? DoD Says ‘Maybe’

February 20, 2018 By Guest Contributor Leave a Comment

by Chloe Moore , Guest Contributor

Ask a military spouse to list the top 3 distinct challenges faced in their military life and you can bet most of them are going to say PCSing. The constant relocation can do a serious number on a family’s ability to thrive.

This makes PCS news from the Pentagon eyebrow-raising: they’re considering limiting the amount of moves that a military family has to make.

Fewer PCSes In Our Future? DoD Says 'Maybe'

In an interview with the Fayetteville Observer, the Undersecretary of Defense for Personnel and Readiness John Wilkie said that while “nothing is set in stone” (Is it ever?) it is “more than idle chatter.”

The idea is that large military installations, like Fort Bragg and Naval Station Norfolk, have the capacity to support military families for extended tours that stretch beyond the typical 2 or 3 years. Extended tours would ultimately allow troops and their families to enjoy fewer relocations and the associated challenges of those moves.

Today’s Military Family Is Changing The Department Of Defense’s Systems

At the core of the shift lies the military family. In Wilkie’s overview of why the challenge is being taken seriously, he returned repeatedly to the modern military family.

According to him, “It (the PCS system) was built at a time when less than 10 percent of the military had families. Today, 70 percent have families.”

So there’s that; there’s the fact that the family unit is a foundational part of the military like it has never before been in American history, and that families oftentimes suffer because of the manner in which the PCS system operates. Not only that, but we’re operating within a volunteer service model, which means that at this point the government has to acknowledge that if needs aren’t met, their volunteers will dry up.

Drew Brooks, the military editor for the Fayetteville Observer, wrote

“While many in the Pentagon are focused on big dollar programs that lead to new ships and planes, Wilkie said the readiness of the military is one of the issues that keeps him up at night. He said new planes are worthless if there are no people to maintain or fly them.”

At the very least, it’s refreshing to hear someone recognize that the driving force behind successful or unsuccessful military operations are its people.

The Potential Benefits Of Fewer PCSes

In terms of personal health, there are a plethora of positives. Most of us have felt at least a tinge of relocation depression as we’ve unpacked yet another round of boxes. Most of us know what it is to compare a new duty station with the well-loved one we’ve left behind. And more than that, we know what it is to have readjust relationally.

Professional Health: A few years ago a study came out that showcased the fact that a whopping 90% of military spouses are either underemployed or unemployed. Beyond the implications of that on a personal level, it’s been estimated the economy also misses out on nearly one billion dollars a year because of the trend.

There’s not a lot of upward mobility on the career ladder when frequent moves require you to constantly start over.

There are certainly employers who want to utilize military spouses. But, there are also those in military communities who recognize the trail of locations on a resume for what they are and become less likely to hire knowing that that individual is unlikely a long-term investment.

Do you want want a PCS proof career? Listen to the NGMS Happy Hour Episode 56!

Psychological Health: The PCS system can negatively impact the emotional and relational well-being of service members and their dependants in a vast amount of ways. It’s an overwhelming subject to tackle. In an overview of social work in conjunction with service members, the University of Nevada, Reno found that, “3.8 million veterans live with a service-connected disability.” For those 3.8 million who struggle with everything from PTSD to anxiety and depression, and for those still serving, by default they must consistently re-start with caregivers.

And, of course, beyond the service member, dependents suffer emotionally as well. While the research isn’t conclusive, there is some that points to the fact that military kids struggle to cope. When Healthline looked at a study that compared military kids with non-military kids, the military kids had “a higher prevalence of substance use, violence, harassment, and weapon-carrying than their nonmilitary peers.”

And a suspected core issue, up there with frequent deployments, is the reality of frequent relocations for kids who are typically less equipped than adults to cope with the upheaval of frequent moves.

It’s not difficult to see how fewer moves could potentially make things, even a smidgen easier for both the service member and the family that supports him or her.

It’s easy to see how fewer moves could help the military.

Click To Tweet

Fewer Relocations Is Not A Brand New Proposition

There have been times when different government entities have suggested the same type of shift. Ultimately, while nothing substantial has shifted, it is still worthwhile to note that the problems military families see with the system are also seen among the very highest levels.

Fewer PCSes In Our Future? DoD Says 'Maybe'

In 2012, the Army went public with its efforts to limit PCSes. In an attempt to strategize for the increased stability and health of troops they came to an unsurprising conclusion: one of the most straightforward ways in which to secure a force that would be more consistent and effective was to make sure that those troops remained in one local for at least 36 months.

The Cost Of Frequent PCSes

In 2016, Zachariah Hughes wrote for NPR that

“Every year, the U.S. military moves hundreds of thousands of service members and their families all across the globe. In 2014, the Defense Department spent more than $4.3 billion on moving costs, but officials don’t know where all that money is going.”

This statement, depending on how long you’ve been a part of the military lifestyle, may or may not surprise you. The hope would be that in a world where the paychecks of those who serve at the most nitty-gritty level are threatened whenever there’s a budgetary issue, the money would be streamlined.

However, that’s not the case. When Brenda Farrell interviewed officials for a report she authored for the Government Accountability Office she ran into an interesting something: “When we asked the DOD officials during our review ‘When was the last time an evaluation was made of the PCS program,’ none of them could recall such an evaluation being done.”

For those among us who may be skeptical that the family health angle will really inspire change, there is perhaps a greater degree of hope when considering that the government knows that there is a financial incentive to move military families less often.

The Drawbacks Of Fewer Moves

Obviously, this would not fix any and all duty station grief. In fact, in some cases it would likely only make some struggles worse. The reality is that while we can all call to mind duty stations that we loved and hated leaving, and friends we still miss, we can all also remember those wherein the goodbyes couldn’t come quickly enough, and we really never looked back.

How would your military family benefit for fewer moves?

Click To Tweet

Because at the core of the issue stands the truth that moving frequently as a way of life is hard and to some degree that can’t be fixed. There will always just be places and people who fit into our lives easier than others.

However, it’s also true that if the Pentagon does decide to implement longer tours, for some of us, one of those sets of orders may come just when our family needs it most.

How would your military family benefit for fewer PCSes? Share your thoughts in the NextGen MilSpouse Facebook group. 

By day Chloe Moore writes content for an internet marketing company, and by night she freelances. She’s a parent and a Navy spouse who enjoys rereading “East of Eden” and rewatching “The Office” when the stars align and she has the time.

Filed Under: Articles, News & Politics, PCS, Slider Tagged With: Design, DoD policy, Military Children, Moving with the Military, Navy spouse, pcs, relocation, stress

Say Yes To Living Outside Your Comfort Zone

November 27, 2017 By Karen Poisson Leave a Comment

 

Mark Twain once said “I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.” He was trying to tell us that there is more to life than what can be gleaned from the classroom.

Life is about experiences!

I believe that this is just as true today and more so as a military spouse who is getting ready to PCS overseas.

When my spouse was assigned to Korea, the kids and I had to remain stateside. We missed him terribly but anticipated the day we could visit. That moment came in December. We planned a 3-week tour so we could fully experience the culture.

Both children, picky eaters at the time, delighted in finding Burger King in Seoul. We had the tastiest chicken nuggets ever.

After that, the kids were willing to try a traditional restaurant. They loved sitting on the floor! And after trying traditional foods, they wanted more kimchi when it was offered.

My husband wanted to take us to an antique shop out in the country. For the first time in a while, the kids didn’t balk at driving somewhere. When we arrived, we found the proprietor who offered to show us around. This retired history teacher sat at small propane heater and talked to the children while I perused the furniture.

I found a 19th century Tibetan Buddhist altar that I fell in love with. The owner told the story of its provenance to us which made it all the more special.

It has become a multipurpose piece of furniture. I have used it in the bedroom for clothes storage and I’ve used it in the dining room to keep our fine china or as a bar.

Say Yes To Living Outside Your Comfort Zone

Even though we didn’t live in Korea, those 3 weeks gave us a taste of life in a place we may never have seen on our own.

Military life is about new experiences and stepping outside your comfort zone.

Click To Tweet

More than 10 years later, we once again had the honor of being assigned overseas. This time we landed on the European continent in Belgium.

My spouse and I hail from New England so I walk fast, I talk fast, and I’m always on full throttle. After my spouse picked us up at the airport, he drove us to the Gran Place in downtown Mons.

Immediately, I had to decelerate my whole being because the only fast lane is on the highway. The waiter came over, took our order and then left us alone. No one pestered us to leave but then again, no one was refilling my water glass either. The message is clear:

“Slow down and take time to smell the roses.”

Eventually my temperament changed and I learned to enjoy the things around me.

Say Yes To Living Outside Your Comfort Zone

We made the decision to not live on base. If we were living in Europe, then we were LIVING in Europe.

We lived in the French speaking part of Belgium where agriculture is the main way of life. I am a city girl and I envisioned myself miserable for our 3 years. I couldn’t have been more wrong.

There were cows in the field behind us, a goat next door and an orchard at the end of the road. All of that just added to the beauty of our location and I came to savor the tranquility.

An egg man came by our house once a week to deliver eggs. If you’ve never tried an unrefrigerated fresh egg, you don’t know what you are missing. The color is amazing and the taste is as equally awesome.

We decided to not live on base. If we were living in Europe, then we were LIVING in Europe.

Click To Tweet

Say Yes To Living Outside Your Comfort Zone

The longer we remained in Europe, the more I collected lessons and learned new things.

I’d always been a history buff but visiting cities around the continent made those book lessons a reality. As you meander through Rome, you can’t help but find history alive at every turn. Reading about peasants worshiping in medieval churches is nothing in comparison to wandering around those same churches. You start to truly understand the mindset of the people from that time.

My daughter and I planned a girls trip to Budapest one weekend. After we settled into the hotel, we were hungry so we asked the concierge where to go. He directed us to a restaurant on the Pest side of the city.

When we arrived, we noticed a plethora of Mercedes and men dressed like secret service or the Mafia. We took a chance and sat down.

My daughter ordered an appetizer, rabbit stew and dessert as well as a few sodas. I also chose an appetizer, had the Hungarian goulash, dessert and a few glasses of wine. Everything was delicious.

When the bill came, the host asked if we’d like it in Euros instead. Of course, that’s the currency we were familiar with. Imagine our surprise when the whole thing came to €20! We had a fabulous meal with entertainment and we experienced a little of life in a former communist country.

All of these examples just go to show you that life is better when you take some chances and step outside your comfort zone.

By embracing your new location and trying new things, you will learn more about yourself as well as your host country. Don’t immediately revert back to your usual. When you don’t, you collect stories and experiences that will enrich your life tenfold.

Filed Under: Articles, Military Lifestyle, PCS, Slider Tagged With: Air Force spouse, Asia, empowerment, Europe, Just Say Yes, married to the military, military family, military life, OCONUS, travel

My Unbelievable DITY Story

August 14, 2017 By Guest Contributor Leave a Comment

 

by Patricia Neleski, Guest Contributor

Unicorns carried our household goods away in golden chariots.

Yep, I said it.

Because when I tell you the real story, you are just as likely to disbelieve it.

We did it ourselves and we’d do it again! Or rather, we used the Navy’s DITY move system for our final retirement move, instead of hiring a mover.

Even though DITY stands for Do It Yourself, we didn’t really do it ourselves.

We hired trusted friends to help us pack, babysit while we packed and then, we hired a military volunteer group to load our goods onto the trucks. At the other end we paid teens to help move everything into our final destination.

My husband took care of the financials for the move. He got receipts for all the labor and kept receipts for all our packing supplies, the truck rentals, everything! He is very thorough.

To say I enjoyed every part of our DITY move would be a lie.

To say I will never forget it, never regret it, is the absolute truth.

Ours was a big house, 5  bedrooms — we have 4 kids —  so it took a while. We started early on our own. For months, I saved large and small boxes and started going through our things, separating things into piles for a yard sale, stacks for the thrift store and setting aside special gifts to bequeath to friends and family. After we had settled on what would go and what would stay, we gave each of the kids boxes of different sizes and sharpies to begin packing their things.

The younger kids were reluctant at first, because every time something went into a box, they worried they might need it again before we got to our new home. So the boxes remained unsealed until the last day.

Then, Ed and I assembled our assist team.

My beloved neighbors and friends, Jennifer, Amy and Bianca, were there for parts of every day for 2 weeks. They took turns packing boxes, sweeping corners and babysitting. The small boxes proved very useful, as we packed small fragile items in small boxes and tucked them inside larger boxes for extra padding and to make the boxes easier to identify when we got to our new home.

On each box, I scrawled a complete list of what was inside the box. Recently, I found a holiday box tucked in the garage with this list: treasured homemade crèche, headless Joseph, Joseph’s head, hand crocheted angel, tinsel. This year, I promise, I will glue his head back on, but until then, I know where it is thanks to our thorough inventories!

My Unbelieveable DITY Story

In the midst of all the packing, my friends were in every inch of my house. They found the candy wrappers behind the rice in the pantry. Sorry about that!

And one day, I had to chase Jennifer out of my bathroom where she was scrubbing my toilet — I love you girl and that’s why you can’t scrub my toilets!

Closer to moving day, Ed contacted the Norfolk Naval Operations Base Chief Petty Officers Association and offered to hire the Chief Selectees, the group of new E7 CPOs preparing for their initiation, to help us pack the trucks. There were 3 trucks.

On moving day, the Chief Selectees showed up half an hour early, which I know is military for on-time. They were ready to start work, but suddenly I wasn’t.

As I stood in my house full of boxes, I grieved for the end of our old life and the beginning of the new one. “Stop, I’m not ready,” I wanted to scream.

Sure, we would all keep in touch, and text and call, but it would never again be the same. I knew that from a lifetime of military moves.

The empty freezer brought it all home to me: the day before I had given away the last of the food because it wouldn’t travel well. Empty freezer, empty house.

Things moved quickly after that — military people can pack a truck in a hurry!

At lunchtime, I looked up and the whole gang was back, with kids and dogs and covered dishes, and someone had fired up the barbecue grill. They had taken all my leftover food and cooked it! There was enough for everyone and we ate as we worked.

It wasn’t perfect, but that made it perfect. A dog threw up, a kid blew out a diaper, a neighbor complained we were blocking the driveway. (We weren’t!) The usual.

And when we got to our new home, I had one last surprise. Amy and Jennifer had tucked my tomato plants and rose bushes into the very last foot of space behind the rolling door.

The movers wouldn’t have done that.

Patricia NeleskiPatricia Neleski owns http://www.navyrackpacks.com an American company that provides privacy, storage, blackout curtains for Navy, Marine Corps, and Coast Guard seagoing personnel. Patricia also worked for several years as a journalist, as both a staff writer and freelance writer for the Virginian-Pilot. Her stories have appeared in HamptonRoads.com, Navy Times, Florida Times-Union, among others.

Filed Under: Articles, PCS, Slider Tagged With: Connect the Dots, DITY tips, empowerment, military retirement, Moving day, Navy spouse, pcs, tips and tricks

When You Feel Like The New Kid On Post

August 11, 2017 By K.C. Hastings Leave a Comment

 

When my husband accepted a job in New Jersey, I knew no one!

But I wasn’t worried. I like a challenge.When A Military Spouse Feels Like The New Kid On The Block

Whether you are newly married or you just PCSed, you may feel like the new kid on post. We’ve all been there before and it can feel a bit awkward and lonely.

Here are 5 ways to dive right in and shake off that new kid feeling like a pro!

Research

Research everything! If you’re a new military spouse it is a good idea to find websites (just like this one!) and learn all you can about military spouse life.

If you have just PCSed to a new duty station you should research everything from the best places to live, to things to do, to local customs. The more informed you are, the better you’ll feel.

Once I learned how close we were to NYC, the beach and tons of historical monuments and parks I was excited to get here!

Find A Way To Feel At Home

Decorate your new home and figure out what local stores you want to shop at regularly. Find a local coffee shop and a favorite movie theater. These little comforts will help shake off that awkward newness.

I tried out several libraries, pizza places, 2 different commissaries and 5 different beaches before finding the ones that were right for us. Also, once I figured out how to get everywhere by myself it began to feel like home.

Get Involved On Base

Nothing will make you feel like you belong like being involved in the local and military communities. Get involved with the FRG, the craft shop or hobby shop and events on post to get to know other military spouses in your area.

They will be your support system during deployments and you will be thankful for them.

Military balls and family days are some of my favorite places to meet new military spouses and make friends! Also, “like” the military base Facebook page in your area to stay up-to-date with things that are going on.

Get Involved Locally

Go to the local library and get the events schedule. Volunteer at your kid’s new school and go to city council meetings. Join parent and hobby groups in your area, and before you know it – you’ll feel like a local.

Military spouses have a great opportunity to improve every new community they move to. Even if you’re only there for 2 years, your mental health and your community will benefit from your involvement.

Make Friends

Whether it’s a barbecue invite from a coworker or a playdate invite, you should go! It can seem awkward at first, but once you get past the small talk you begin to find things in common and make fast friends.

Make sure you give your new friends a way to contact you and maintain the friendship! It’s also a good idea to have a house-warming party and invite your spouse’s coworkers and their families. These are people who will be experiencing every deployment with you – so get to know them!

Whether your new friends are military or not doesn’t really matter, but having a mixture of both can be greatly helpful. Putting yourself out there can be hard, but it will be worth it when you have someone to hang out with, talk to and call for help when you need it.

All of this can seem really overwhelming especially if you’re an introvert like me! But sometimes, you just have to make yourself do it.

The faster you feel at home, the easier it will be when your spouse is TDY or deployed.

What steps do you take to start feeling at home at a new military post? 

Filed Under: Articles, Military Lifestyle, PCS, Slider Tagged With: Army spouse, Connect the Dots, military life, pcs, PCS tips

3 Tips To Help Your Family Adjust To A New Duty Station

August 1, 2017 By Guest Contributor Leave a Comment

 

by Amanda K. Marksmeier, Guest Contributor

3 Tips To Help Your Military Family Adjust To A New Duty Station

Standing in our kitchen in Tennessee I broke the news to my children – my husband received orders and we will be moving in 6 months.

My daughter burst into tears and said she wasn’t going.

My middle son followed suit with the tears saying he can’t be without his sister.

The youngest, our just-go-with-it kid, said “So Texas huh?”

We spent the next 6 months researching our new home and searching for the silver lining in our future.

Here are 3 things that helped our family adjust to our new duty station.

Don’t Believe The Hype

Do your own research. Each duty station has pros and cons, try not to focus too much on the cons. Talk to people who have lived in your new city. Chances are someone in your military family has been stationed at or trained at your new duty station.

While you are gaining insight from your military community, take everything with a grain of salt. Some people may dislike a post because it was too far from family. Others may love a post because that is where they met their lifelong friends. Someone may have experienced a personal tragedy and associates that with the base.

When we told people we had orders to Texas we were met with stories of crime, drugs and cartels. When I did my own research I found that while the city we were moving to did have a violent history, the present boasted the “safest large city in America.” I was still apprehensive so I continued to look for more information.

Find the local news outlets and follow them on social media. This will provide you with the good, the bad and the ugly that takes place in your new city.

There are tons of groups for military spouses on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. Seek them out and ask questions. Follow them as well, you will learn from other’s comments and conversations.

People tend to dwell on the negative so ask for positive input and focus on that.

I am not saying to ignore the negative but try to put a positive spin on things. My husband says you need to find 6 positive things to outweigh 1 negative. So pull out those scales and start balancing!

Get Back Into The Routine

Kids need structure, they thrive on it. Moving will definitely upset your family structure, it is unavoidable.

Living out of a suitcase, sleeping on the floor and eating out all throw a wrench in our routine. I usually like to treat this transition time like a vacation. We explore the country, try new restaurants and get to “camp out.”

Once our household goods arrive, we begin to settle in. It is time to reestablish our family routine.

Getting the kids enrolled in school is the first step to normalcy. Go to the school, introduce yourselves and ask for a tour of the school. This will help familiarize your children with their new environment. Ask lots of questions such as how to drop off and pick up, what are the bus routes like, what’s for lunch and what is the dress code.

If your child was previously involved in extracurricular activities ask about these too. They will provide a wealth of information not only about the school but also have tons of knowledge about your new home.

At our last duty station my daughter had a part-time job, my middle son was very involved in the local community theater and my youngest was working toward his goal of becoming a ninja. These things are important to them, so they are important to me.

I drove around with my daughter to get familiar with the area and dropped off job applications to every store and restaurant within a 20-mile radius. We made sure the high school my middle son attended had an active theater program and wasted no time getting involved. For my aspiring ninja we visited several dojos to find the right fit for him.

Establishing these activities helps to maintain the routine your family had at your prior home. Not only are these great ways for your kids to meet other kids who share the same interests, it also helps them create the new normal in their new home.

Enjoy The Uniqueness Of Your New Home

Each place you live will offer unique experiences. Places are like people. Each is different and special in its own way.

Some places, just like people, may need a bit of coxing to find the interesting or exciting parts. Give your new home a chance to show off its unique side.

We found a quaint little town about 45 minutes away which is home to the only jail Billy the Kid ever broken into and the oldest highway in America. It was a fun and educational trip. For the history buff that I am, it was amazing to walk down the same road that has been traveled for hundreds of years.

Not only have these experiences bonded us as a family, they have helped us to enjoy and appreciate our temporary homes. Whether you are in a place you love or one you are not so fond of, remember every place offers special and unique experiences. It is up to you to find them!

We have been at our new home for about 6 months now and are still settling in.

I can now get around the city most of the time without the GPS. My oldest is still searching for normalcy with the move but has begun working at a local restaurant. My two younger sons have adjusted well and are thriving in their new home.

We are still trying to adjust to the very warm and dry climate. I will say the sunsets are an amazing sight to behold and the food is to die for.

Moving can be scary, overwhelming and stressful, but it can also be exciting, adventurous, and provide new opportunities. Remember the next time you move to pack a positive attitude and silver linings. These will go a long way in helping your family adjust to your new home!

What are your tips to adjusting in a new community? Share them in the comments section.

Amanda K. MarksmeierMy name is Amanda. I am a mom, wife, and a blogger. I have been a mom for 18 years, a military spouse for 9, and a blogger for a couple of months. I am originally from Savannah, Ga., and while I appreciate the opportunity the military has given us to travel the country, I really miss my southern roots at times. There is nothing better than some boiled peanuts, sweet tea, and quality time with mamma. We are currently stationed at Fort Bliss, Texas.

Filed Under: Articles, Military Lifestyle, PCS, Slider Tagged With: Army spouse, Connect the Dots, dealing with stress, military family, PCS tips, tips and tricks

Episode 48: Happy Half Hour PCS Edition

July 20, 2017 By NextGen MilSpouse Staff Writer Leave a Comment

 

It’s summer and while we thought about going on full podcast vacation, we missed you all too much! We’re bringing the Happy Hour back for short episodes over the summer.

Our first one is all about every military family’s favorite summer pastime – moving.

Episode 48: Happy Half Hour PCS Edition

What We’re Talking About on NextGen MilSpouse

  • 10 Moving Checklist Tasks You Don’t Want to Forget During Your Next PCS!
  • Moving with the Military: Your PCS Binder
  • How To Turn Your PCS Into An Epic Family Vacation
  • 6 Essential Steps to Keep Your Sanity During a DITY Move
  • 30 Thoughts I Had While My Movers Unloaded The Moving Truck

Thank You to Our Sponsor, Armed Forces Insurance

NextGen MilSpouse Happy Hour is presented in partnership with Armed Forces Insurance.

Celebrating 130 years of protecting the nation’s current and retire service members, their children and Department of Defense civilians, AFI has a singular mission: You.

Armed Forces Insurance has military specialists and each member has an assigned agent, licensed in every state. From renter to business, home to auto insurance, there is a product to meet your needs.

Get your quote today at AFI.org.

What You Might’ve Missed on Social Media

  • Surprise! Sailor Comes Home to Find Wife 8 Months Pregnant
  • This Spot On Meme About Seasoned Milspouses
  • AMPLIFY Is Coming To Austin, You Don’t Want To Miss It

NextGen MilSpouse’s Happy Hour Podcast is the official podcast of NextGenMilSpouse.com. We offer a fresh and modern take on military life for today’s military spouse. From navigating your career to surviving your next move, NextGen MilSpouse has you covered.

Our news and current events are brought to you by our friends at Military.com. Make sure you never miss a show or a story by subscribing to our podcast on iTunes or GooglePlay and by signing up for the NextGen MilSpouse Newsletter at NextGenMilSpouse.com. Still want more? Connect with us and other listeners in our Happy Hour Facebook Group. 

http://media.blubrry.com/ngmshappyhour/p/nextgenmilspouse.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/Episode-48-Half-Hour-Happy-Hour-PCS.mp3

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | Google Podcasts | RSS | More

Filed Under: Articles, Happy Hour, Military Lifestyle, PCS, Slider, Sponsored Content Tagged With: Happy Hour podcast, pcs, PCS tips

30 Thoughts I Had While My Movers Unloaded The Moving Truck

June 19, 2017 By Jessica Hall Leave a Comment

 

It is the beginning of the end of your PCS.

The camping chairs are no longer comfortable and eating every meal at a restaurant is no longer novel. Your air mattress is slowly deflating and you are soooooo ready for your own bed. The kids are ready for the rest of their books and that one toy that they said they didn’t want for the trip but then asked for every single day.

30 Thoughts I Had While My Movers Unloaded The Moving Truck

But first, the movers have to unload the moving truck. And that goes something like this:

1. They’re here! They’re here!
Happy Joy GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

2. OMG what if something is missing? What if something’s broken?

3. Should I have bought coffee or donuts for them? Will that ensure that they handle everything with care? Too late, they’re blocking my car so no coffee for any of us.

4. Paperwork…all the lists. Time to invent a system.

5. Where’s my pen?

6. Boxes 1-10. Kitchen. Easy. We got this.

7. OOOOH THE COUCH! I MISSED YOU COUCH!

8. Is that a rip in the fabric? No. I’m seeing things…it was the shrink wrap playing a trick on my eyes.

9. Floor lamps? Ummmm just put all of those in the garage.

10. Kids’ toys box. Please have my daughter’s stuffed pig in it.

11. How many legs does our dining room table have 3 or 4?

12. I hope they broke that ugly ass side table. I don’t know why we packed it but I want a new one so…

13. Box #25, #74, #103, #16. Can’t these come off in numerical order?

14. Dining room table leg #4 found, phew.

15. DID THEY BREAK MY BIKE?

Oh Hell No GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

16. Omg they…no, they didn’t. OK, we’re good.

17. HOW DID THE UGLY ASS SIDE TABLE SURVIVE ANOTHER MOVE?!?!?! But my brand new bookshelf? Broken. Every. Single. Time.

18. Cats. Where are the cats? Oh, they found a box. Of course. “Don’t touch this box!”

19. Where is the parts box?

20. Don’t drop that box. Don’t drop that box. Don’t drop that box!

21. Where is the coffee maker? Why didn’t we bring that in the car with us?

Star Wars GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

22. That’s not my coffee table.

23. Why do we have SO MUCH STUFF?

24. Can I throw away (insert spouse or kid’s collection of stuff) and no one will notice? Nope, spouse/kids are looking…

25. Coffee pot found – in a box labeled “laundry room,” obviously.

26. Pens are individually wrapped in 5 sheets of paper, but my plates? One piece each. WTF?

27. The boxes…they won’t end. WILL THEY EVER END?

Laying Down GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

28. Two rooms down, many more to go.

29. Almost done, almost done, almost done.

Do It Best Gif GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

30. SUCCESS! Goodbye paper, goodbye boxes. We are home.

What thoughts do you have while the movers are unloading the moving truck? Share them in the comments section. 

Filed Under: Articles, Military Lifestyle, PCS, Slider Tagged With: Army spouse, Confessional, humor, pcs, We've Come So Far

How To Turn Your PCS Into An Epic Family Vacation

June 12, 2017 By Jessica Hall Leave a Comment

 

Confession: I (kind of) like PCSing.

Not the moving part. I hate packing and unpacking things. I hate the stress of finding a new place to live. Finding a new job is NOT the bee’s knees.

But I love, love, LOVE, the adventure of getting from Point A to Point B. The 3 times that my husband and I have moved we’ve made PCSing into a vacation. And not just any vacation, a pretty epic one.

How To Turn Your PCS Into An Epic Family Vacation

See, we are those people that love a good road trip. It hasn’t happened yet but I want to do the full cross-country move where you stop at all of the “world’s largest” things on the side of the road. The Army hasn’t given us that route yet but we have made each of our moves epic adventures.

We have driven up the California coast. We made it to the Mighty 5 in Utah. And we found Walter White’s house from “Breaking Bad” in Albuquerque.

How do we turned our PCS road trips into epic family vacations? With these 7 simple steps.

How To Turn Your PCS Into An Epic Family Vacation

How To Take Your PCS Road Trip And Turn It Into An Epic Family Vacation

Check ALL possible routes. When my husband and I did our first PCS from Fort Huachuca in southern Arizona to Joint Base Lewis-McChord in Washington state we knew we had to drive up the Pacific Coast Highway.

Was there really another route? Well, fast-forward 4 years and we were going from Washington back to Arizona and we didn’t want to drive the same way. At first we thought that we could do Yosemite National Park and a few others in central California, but then my co-worker suggested Utah. A quick look at Google Maps made us rethink our whole trip. And we did it!

I’m so glad that my co-worker pushed me in that direction because it was the most incredible trip.

While it may seem like there is only one way from Point A to B, there isn’t. Pull out your map or zoom out on Google Maps and see if there is another way that may have something new to see.

Look at a calendar. We have been fairly lucky that we have never had to rush to get to a military installation. Now this does mean that our household goods get put into storage, which is sometimes not ideal.

Work backward from the day that your spouse needs to report to his or her new duty station, look at the route you want to take, and figure out how long it will take to do everything you want to do.

For example, when we drove up the California coast we added a full day in Sonoma for wine tasting. We also knew that we weren’t going to drive 8 hours every day so divide drive time by what you think you’ll actually do. Sure you can drive straight through, but what are you missing? Once you have a general sense of how much time you have from when the movers show up and when you need to be at your new duty station you can start planning.

Also, remember that you may stumble upon something cool that you didn’t know about. When we were driving into Utah we saw a sign for the Golden Spike National Historic Site, the place where the continental railroad met in the 1800s. Being huge history buffs, we took a detour. We knew that we could add an hour or so to our trip because we hadn’t planned an ambitious driving day. It was a fun stop for us and added a great story to our trip.

Make a plan. I love spreadsheets so I map out our schedule from the day we’re leaving to when we arrive. I have columns for date, starting and ending point, travel accommodations and stops we want to make. I’m a visual person so this works really well for me, and has everything in one place for when we’re on the drive and I need to look something up. It also helped me budget our trips, so I knew how much we were spending on lodging versus when we were staying with family or friends (if we could) on the way.

When we were moving from Arizona to Texas I didn’t do a great job looking at the calendar and realized we missed a day. So double and triple check that you didn’t miss any time. Fortunately for us we were able to add a day in Santa Fe which gave us more time to explore and relax.

Save money. Since my husband and I add days to our PCS travels we do have to pay for some of it out-of-pocket but we pull from our vacation savings fund to do just that.

Think of PCS road trip as your summer vacation. Sure you’ll get paid back for mileage and the number of days the military allows for a move from your old location to the new location, but sometimes you may want to splurge on a nice hotel or restaurant. And that’s OK, but factor that in while you’re making your plan so that you don’t come out on the other side with sticker shock.

Make those reservations. You have a plan and you know your budget, so book away!

My husband and I did a mix of hotels and camping for our Utah adventure, but we knew we had to book all of those ahead of time. We were traveling in peak summer vacation season. This meant that at times we stayed a bit further away from places that we would have liked, but we made changes to our plan as need be.

If you plan on camping, check with the park if they allow reservations or if it’s first-come, first-served. If you’re like me and like to have a plan this will help you know if you need to get somewhere early or go nearby so that you know you have a place to sleep.

Pack accordingly. Days before the movers showed up at our house in Washington we got in a car accident. Everyone was fine, except for our SUV.

It was totaled.

It was the car that we had planned on driving (we were going to ship our sedan) and it holds so much stuff that I wasn’t worried about our do-not-pack area.

As soon as we knew that we were going to be driving our sedan I got super stressed. My husband and I kicked it into gear and did a pre-pack of the car of everything we wanted to take with us – luggage (not filled), important files, a few things to survive on when we got to our new home, and camping gear. Once we knew how much stuff fit in the car we could pack and add some camping gear to the pile for the movers.

Also, check the weather of places you’ll be going. Do you need jackets? Bathing suits? Spend some time before the movers arrive to sort your clothes, kitchen gear, etc. and see what fits in your car. Then you won’t be as stressed when the movers dump everything into boxes.

Have fun! Knowing that I have a fun adventure in the middle of the craziness that is a PCS really helps me cope with uprooting our lives.

The road trip helps us relax, recharge and see new parts of this amazing country that we all call home. So take pictures, unplug as much as you can, and live in the moment. The military may not send you on that route again, so make the most of it!

Do you turn your PCS road trips into epic family adventures? How do you do it? Share your PCS family vacation stories and pictures in the comments section. 

Filed Under: Articles, Military Lifestyle, PCS, Slider Tagged With: Army spouse, Confessional, moving, pcs, PCS tips, road trip, We've Come So Far

10 Things This Military Spouse Is Not Doing This Summer

June 8, 2017 By Guest Contributor 1 Comment

 

by Christine Maxwell, Guest Contributor

For the first time since the summer of 2012, my family and I are not moving. Count it, that’s 5 consecutive years, where we moved every single summer.

My husband and I joke that our family celebrates the Fourth of July by unpacking a mountain of boxes and eating take-out on paper plates instead of the traditional American barbecue, because like clockwork, we always seem to PCS in early July.

Looking back at so many of our moves, I can even find humor in the situation. I always have to remind myself that whenever I’m in the throes of a PCS and nothing is going according to plan, I’ll someday look back and laugh at the situation.

With so many PCS stories to choose from, it’s hard to pick a “favorite.”

Maybe it was sleeping on an air mattress and eating dinner on a cardboard box for 2 months because our household goods that we planned ahead and shipped early, got stuck in customs for 2 months.

10 Things This Military Spouse Is Not Doing This Summer

There was always that time I filled my car’s gas tank the day I was supposed to ship it with an empty tank. I had to convince a Korean mechanic to drain it in time.

10 Things This Military Spouse Is Not Doing This Summer

Alternatively, there was that time I was 7 months pregnant in the heat of a Fort Hood summer, pleading with the movers to stop bringing another family’s household goods into my new home.

10 Things This Military Spouse Is Not Doing This Summer

Most recently, it was the time when my husband deployed to Afghanistan and my toddler, 2 dogs and I drove across 2 time zones on our own to get to our new home. It’s “funny” how my husband, often seems to not be around for the PCS, very convenient, but I guess deployment is a valid excuse.

However, this summer there will be no PCS and my family and I will be staying put in our own home.

There will be no moving boxes, no change of address cards and no stress of packing up our entire lives into a million boxes and moving it to a new duty station.

It’s a strange phenomenon that I’m not accustomed too, and get this, my husband won’t even be deployed or TDY. It’s almost as if I’m getting a taste of civilian life again, almost. There are so many helpful lists of things to do in preparation for a PCS, but below is my list of 10 things I’m not going to do this summer!

10 Things This Military Spouse Is Not Doing This Summer

10  Things This Military Spouse Is NOT Going To Do This Summer

1. I’m not going to say so long (a seasoned milspouse knows never to say goodbye) to all the awesome new friends and neighbors I’ve met over the last year. Instead, I’m going to enjoy all the time I have left with my friends and make some new ones too!

2. I’m not going to take down every single picture I just hung up in my home. In fact, I have new decorations to add…especially the ones in my home office that have been sitting propped against the wall for the last 11 months.

3. I’m not going to frantically contact all the daycare centers in a 30-mile radius, looking for child care for my son. I’m not even going to make any daily calls to the CDC to inquire about my son’s waitlist status. I’m going to enjoy the continuity of sending him to school every day with the same teachers he’s had for a year.

4. I’m not going to search for a new dentist, pediatrician, eye doctor, babysitter, hair stylist, dry cleaner, vet or kennel for my dogs, or internet/trash/utilities provider…you get it, the list goes on.

5. I’m not going to give/throw away all our liquor, candles, cleaning supplies, propane tanks and food. Instead, I might take said liquor, make myself a drink, light the candles I didn’t have to throw away and enjoy a relaxing bath.

6. I’m not going to gain 10 pounds from spending all my time sitting in a car, road tripping across the country as I frantically try to beat the movers to our next location. Likewise, I won’t be stuck in a cramped extended-stay hotel, eating out for all my meals.

7. I’m not going to cry over the gouges the movers put in the hope chest my grandmother left to me or pick up broke pieces of our wedding china. I’ll save those worries for the next PCS.

8. I’m not going to spend hours researching and analyzing the perfect new home to rent or buy. I won’t worry about finding a magical unicorn house that combines the perfect price, school system, bedroom count, commute to work, and proximity to Target, all in one location.

9. I’m not going to watch the weather like it’s my new full time job as I worry about whether or not it’s going to rain cats and dogs on moving day. We may live in the high desert of Colorado, but I guarantee you it always rains on our moving day.

10. I’m not going to roll my eyes when the moving contractor tells me that, “we can definitely pack you out and move you in under 2 days.”

Maybe it sounds a little bit like I’m bragging, but I promise you I’m not. I know that a summer without a PCS is a special treat and I appreciate that.

If you are dealing with a PCS this summer, I will be thinking about you and sending you positive PCS vibes. Whether it’s your first PCS or your 10th, they’re still a pain and no matter how much you plan and organize, something always still goes wrong. As military spouses, we learn to roll with the punches. It’s just what we do and we always make it work.

For now, I’m going to enjoy my PCS-less summer because I know that Summer 2018 and the PCS that comes with it, will be here soon enough.

Christine MaxwellChristine Maxwell is an Army wife and toddler mom.  She works as a Budget Manager in Higher Education and also manages HerMoneyMoves, a blog about personal finances, career and military family life geared toward military spouses and their families.

Filed Under: Articles, Military Lifestyle, PCS, Slider Tagged With: Army spouse, Confessional, humor, military life, moving, pcs, We've Come So Far, working military spouse

6 Essential Steps to Keep Your Sanity During a DITY Move

June 6, 2017 By Michelle Volkmann Leave a Comment

 

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of Armed Forces Insurance. All opinions are 100% mine.

6 Essential Steps to Keep Your Sanity During a DITY Move

There is 1 topic that divides the military community into 2 camps.

It’s not religion, politics or foreign policy.

It’s the decision to opt for a Personally Procured Move (PPM), more commonly known as a DITY (Do-It-Yourself) Move.

Military families, who brave the paperwork of a PPM, are the ones that flatten, store and reuse their moving boxes after each PCS. They are the dedicated ones who pack a few boxes each night in the weeks leading up to their relocation date. They are the calm ones who don’t fret over when the moving truck will arrive at their new home. They aren’t concerned because they are the ones driving it.

DITY moving military couples are the ones who shake their heads and knowingly smile at each other when their neighbors complain about the insane packing decisions of their professional packers.

Want to complain about your trash that was packed and shipped to Kentucky? Look for someone who didn’t DITY.

The advantages of a DITY move are as numerous as the reasons to opt for professional movers.

Seek permission. Are you considering doing a DITY move this PCS season? Here are 6 essential steps to ensure that you keep your sanity during your DITY move.You can’t beg for forgiveness when it comes to a PPM. Once you decide that you want to do a DITY move, your service member needs to complete the proper paperwork at his or her Travel Management Office (TMO).

Your service member will be given a complete list of reimbursement costs along with the list of items that you will not be reimbursed for. For example, the cost of packing materials is included under a PPM. But if you buy a tow dolly, that item is not.

Information is power, so make sure you fully understand the specifics of a DITY move. You also need an accurate weight estimate of your household goods. Your TMO office has information on how to calculate your property weight.

Take your PCS binder to the next level. When you move, you need to have a PCS binder as your safe place for documents, receipts, military orders and forms to carry with you during travel. You don’t want to be hunting for a U-Haul receipt at the bottom of your purse when your service member needs it. Trust me.

Here is a list of necessary documents to keep in your PCS binder:

  • DD 1351-2: Travel Voucher
  • DD 2278: Application for DITY Move & Counseling Checklist
  • Copy of PCS Travel Orders
  • Certified Weigh Tickets, one for Gross (full) weight and one for Tare (empty) weight. TMO recommends that you tape each ticket to a piece of paper.
  • Copy of Paid Rental Agreement
  • Copy of vehicle registration when utilizing POV and/or boat/trailer
  • Common Operating Personal Expenses (OPE)

Being organized and detailed are essential skills for successful DITY moving military spouses. By having your documents readily accessible, you won’t feel stressed when it’s time to get reimbursed for your moving expenses.

Reduce your costs as much as possible. With a PPM, the government pays you 95 percent of the total cost it would be for them to hire a moving company to take your household goods from point A to point B.

Smart DITY packers are the ones who post on Facebook in the month before their move “hey anyone have any boxes or packing paper that they don’t need any more?” If you live in a military community, I guarantee that as you are packing up, some other military family is unpacking their household goods. Save yourself a lot of time spent running around looking for free boxes from retail stores, by reusing another military family’s old boxes.

When reserving your moving truck, don’t forget to ask for a military discount. Many national moving companies offer discounts for active duty and National Guard members.

Aim to pack smarter, not harder. Look for anything that is box-like in your house and use it as a moving box.

Food storage containers? Fill them with small and loose items. If you have the original boxes for anything you purchased, put the items back in to those boxes. For example, pack the television in its original box and the computer monitor in its box.

Don’t pack towels and blankets in boxes. Use them to wrap your furniture and breakable items. Again, it goes back to packing smarter, not harder. Think creatively when you pack up your items.

Insure your move. The government is not liable for any loss or damages that occur during a personally procured move. Since you are the one packing your household items, you are the one responsible if your sofa cushion is ripped or the corner of your desk is cracked. Makes sense, right?

Now let’s talk worst-case scenario.

What if there’s a heavy thunderstorm while you are driving to your new duty station and while unpacking you discover that your moving truck roof had a leak and now your dining room table has water damage? Are those damages covered under your renter insurance?

What if you are in a traffic accident while driving your moving truck? Is that covered under your auto insurance?

You don’t want to face these worse-case scenarios without adequate insurance coverage. It is your responsibility to purchase the proper insurance to cover your rental equipment, including the moving truck, and your household goods.

Insurance doesn’t have to be a difficult or costly process either. For less than $15 a month you can protect your property while you are renting and during a PCS move. Renter insurance from Armed Forces Insurance will cover your belongings from theft, fire, vehicle accidents, mysterious disappearances, etc. during a move.

Give yourself peace of mind and sneak a free quote at www.afi.org.

Find friends who are willing to do the heavy lifting. Moving day will go smoother and faster if you can find 4 friends to help you. I recently helped my sister move into her new house and it was amazing how quickly you can load and unload a moving truck when you have 6 people.

While a PPM is technically a Do-It-Yourself move, you don’t want to do it alone. Ask your church group, workout buddies, neighbors and even a few high school football team members to help you with the heavy lifting.

Don’t forget to thank them with pizza and water. Free food is always the best payment when it comes to packing on moving day.

Moving yourself is a great option if you have the time, patience and motivation. As I said in the beginning, military couples who are dedicated to DITY moves often preach about the benefits of this PCS option.

Want more advice on a PPM? Hit up the NextGen MilSpouse Facebook page with your questions and concerns.

Are you a dedicated DITY mover? What tips do you have for military couples who want to opt for a PPM? Share them in the comments section.

Filed Under: Articles, PCS, Slider Tagged With: DITY tips, military life, moving, Navy spouse, pcs

  • « Previous Page
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • …
  • 8
  • Next Page »

Connect with us!

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • RSS
  • Twitter

Find Your Faves!

Navigate

  • About Us
  • PR & Media
  • Contact Us
  • Privacy Policy
  • Write With Us
  • MSB New Media

Connect with us!

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • RSS
  • Twitter

Listen Now!

on Apple Podcastson Androidon Google Podcastsvia RSSMore Subscribe Options

MSB New Media | NextGen MilSpouse

Advertise

  • Paid Reviews are available

Copyright © 2019 MSB New Media, LLC